i think im in a tragedy

just watched Stranger Than Fiction (on video) yesterday starring Will Ferrell, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Emma Thompson and Dustin Hoffman. i thought it was a comedy because its a Will Ferrell movie. so i was a bit surprised when the guy in Video City told me it was in the drama section when i asked if they had a copy of the movie. and the reason i thought of renting it was because i saw its trailer in one of the videos i rented (i watch the trailers so i know which movies to rent next). and after watching the movie, i cant believe i didnt notice this movie when it was released in cinemas (but i watched the piece of crap of a movie Pathfinder. since then, i research on the movie before watching it). i checked IMDb and it said it was just released last January 24. where was i then? why didnt i notice this movie? obviously, i loved Stranger than Fiction after watching it on video.

although its not really a comedy, Will Ferrell's character is fun to watch and to a certain extent funny but he doesnt ruin the seriousness that the movie is supposed to have. i mean, all he has to do is be this plain guy with a plain life. but of course, his life became interesting when all of a sudden he hears the voice of a person narrating his life and realizes that he might be a character in a story. the thing is, i think the idea of this movie is very original because i havent seen anything like it. there might be similar ones or similar themes but not close enough to really think that this movie is like this movie or worse its a rip off of another movie.

the character Will Ferrell played reminded me of me, in a shallow sense of course. i dont hear a voice narrating my life but i also counted brush strokes but not the same number as his brush strokes. i wear my wrist watch on my right wrist and i also have an attachment to my wristwatch. and when i watched the movie, my wristwatch just stopped the day before. also, im pretty much a solitary type of guy (which is different from a loner. im both). thats it. its really shallow similarities.

also, the movie gave me a way of explaining my life (of course not in its entirety because im not harold crick/will ferrell's character). before i dont know how to put into words the explanation why i live my life. but somehow the movie was able to state it in a way thats a bit of an appropriate description. so here it is: my life is lived in a way that i refuse to let the plot continue because i might be in a tragedy and not a comedy. of course, the only way of finding out is by taking the next step. and thats just it, i dont want to take the next step until i get an idea where i am exactly. not that im worried of the ending. regardless of whether its a comedy or a tragedy, the ending isnt something to worry about. its how you get there, especially if its a tragedy. its what happens before the ending that worries me. so thats why i dont complain (not much) that im "stuck" in this part of my life because i intentionally refuse to let the plot unfold. or at least let the plot move slower than its supposed to be, to the point it might not be attuned to the rest of what its supposed to be connected with. the movie didnt cover this part of my life that could put into words the idea i have which is somehow related to my own understanding of karma.

Quotes from the movie:

This is a story about a man named Harold Crick and his wristwatch. Harold Crick was a man of infinite numbers, endless calculations, and remarkably few words. And his wristwatch said even less. Every weekday, for twelve years, Harold would brush each of his thirty-two teeth seventy-six times. Thirty-eight times back and forth, thirty-eight times up and down. Every weekday, for twelve years, Harold would tie his tie in a single Windsor knot instead of the double, thereby saving up to forty-three seconds. His wristwatch thought the single Windsor made his neck look fat, but said nothing. - Kay Eiffel as the Narrator

Anarchists have a group?...They assemble?...Wouldn't that completely defeat the purpose? - Ana Pascal

What is wrong with you? Hey, I don't want to eat nothing but pancakes, I want to live! I mean, who in their right mind in a choice between pancakes and living chooses pancakes? - Harold Crick

Little did he know. That means there's something he doesn't know, which means there's something you don't know, did you know that? - Dr. Hilbert

caffeine got my tongue

i dont know exactly when or how it started but i suddenly became a coffee addict. what i know is that it started with me buying coffee in the mall. on which coffee shop, i cant remember. since then, i got hooked. again.

years ago i also got addicted to coffee but that was instant coffee. i remember that i would always buy them coffee packets and use 2-3 at a time. so im not really drinking a cup of coffee, i was drinking a mug of coffee. although i buy cold ones in coffee shops, most of the time, it was instant coffee. the reason the addiction didnt last long was because the caffeine gave me headaches (i think its the caffeine because the decaf ones dont bother me). and once the effect of the coffee wears off, i get extremely drowsy. also, the reason i drank coffee was because i needed something to keep me awake or at least keep me alert.

now, im addicted not to instant coffee but to "coffee shop" coffee. i usually order cappuccino because thats whats usually available. and i only order hot coffee, unlike before where i order cold drinks whenever i buy something from coffee shops. and i dont like instant coffee anymore because the reason i drink coffee now is because of the taste and not because i need something to keep me alert. and having tasted different coffees from different coffee shops, ive realized how inferior instant coffees are when it comes to taste.

i think its been a month now since i got addicted to coffee. of course i did my research on the harmful effects of drinking too much coffee so i try not to abuse or drink too much of it. besides, im prone to hyperacidity. i still get headaches but not as bad as before. i only have very mild ones which are really very slight discomforts. the drowy effects is still there though. once the effect of the coffee wears off, i become extremely sleepy. and whenever i wake up in the morning, i still feel the extreme drowsiness. not sure if my body will adapt to that (no longer feel drowsy after a few hours when the caffeine wears off). i hope it will but i sort of doubt it. not sure if it can be changed by mere state of mind. and im not sure if im going to stop drinking coffee in the next few weeks.

also, ive learned how to drink hot coffee, like learning how to eat sisig. since both of them are served hot, chances are, if the person is not careful, he or she will burn his or her tongue. in the case of sisig, it took some time before i learned how to eat it. since im the type who eats quickly, i get annoyed when i have to wait before i can put the food in my mouth. so i was a bit pissed with eating sisig because its one of my favorite dishes and i cant eat it right away. so, the trick with it is not eating it on the sizzling plate or not having the rice on the sizzling plate (because some serve sisig with the rice in the sizzling plate, so you dont only get a sizzling hot sisig, you also get a sizzling hot rice which takes some time to cool down). its common sensical but it took a lot of burnt tongue before i realized that. so i frequented only those places that serve sisig with rice not placed in the sizzling plate. as for coffee, i had to wait for a few minutes to let it cool down before placing the cover. because i started with drinking it through the cover right after i add the sugar. and with the cover on, you dont get to see the coffee and the next thing you know, youve sipped enough coffee to burn your tongue. thats irritating because it doesnt only affect drinking the coffee but the subsequent meals for the next few days. so although common sensical, it took me a few 2-3 coffees before i realized that i shouldnt cover my coffee right away after adding the sugar. i should let it cool down a bit and once i get the right temperature so i wont scald my tongue, thats when i replace the cover and thats when i start drinking it.

sometimes i give too much thought on things people dont even find significant. like the daily commute for example. commuting is a science as sitting is an art.

poor memory makes brilliant ideas go to waste.

i just hate it when the thought that im supposed to blog about just escapes me. ok. i dont think the phrase "escapes me" is that appropriate. and the statement doesnt seem to be that sound. anyway, i was already trying to sleep, since i went to bed early. then i just felt like i had to blog about this thought running in my head. so i got up, switched the PC on and when i was already connected to the internet, the thought was gone. by the time i was logged in my Blogger account, i couldnt even find a trace of that thought. i hate it when that happens. and it happens a lot. if only i could write the thoughts in my head the moment im really in the mood to write it, i could have written a lot more blog entries than what i just blogged last month (and i could have written the real blog entries i wanted to write since what i write most of the time are merely brainless articles that are devoid of value and significance. well, not completely. it still serves as a record of my thoughts but they really arent ideas or significant thoughts that has more worth than just mere memory aids). im thinking of buying a notepad and a pen so i could write it down whenever and wherever a thought strikes in my head. but i dont think that will happen. ive been meaning to have my right knee checked but its been months and well, im still clueless if there's something wrong with it.