just went to baguio last week. now i know which doctor is telling the truth or at least had a correct diagnosis. after consulting three doctors in a span of more or less four years, 2 of them were to a certain extent correct and one them could be sued for medical malpractice (i think) if i had decided to follow her instructions (tell me to take some chemotherapy capsules huh? theres such a thing as the internet where i can research for side effects and the necessity of such medication. the fact she failed to inform me of it just made her less credible. well, no actual damage was incurred and it was probably because i refused to follow her instructions. if im not convinced, i wont do it).
anyway, i didnt get any of em headaches like the last time i went to baguio (december 05 if i remember correctly). thats good news. or bad news. it depends on whose perspective were using. the fact i didnt experience any headache during my recent stay could mean my blood condition has improved. my blood's viscosity is more normal than before (i used the phrase "more normal" because last semester, my more correct doctor said that its very likely i have no polycythemia after all, it just so happens its natural for me to have an abnormal blood viscosity, more viscous than the normal level...or something to that effect). so, its good news because i dont have a blood illness of some sort. but it also means that my blood is normally abnormal when it comes to blood viscosity/density. a single stick of cigarette made me feel my blood pumping in my nape and various parts of my head (or thats just normal? i dont hear other people complaining about it. and no, its not the rush you feel. i know how that feels). its bad news if im some suicidal guy. the blood illness could have been a one-way ticket out of this miserable world. its a good blood illness too because it provides some sort of loophole on suicide (suicide is defined as intentionally killing oneself). this illness can be easily manipulated to induce death, thereby in effect, intentionally killing one's self. just clog your arteries or blood vessels and let the blood become more dense and the next thing you know youre having a heart attack or a stroke, then just drop dead on the ground. its not really suicide because the cause of death is the blood illness. and death by such illness isnt suicide. also, i dont think cigarette smoking has been categorized as suicide. so a God-fearing suicidal person would like to have an illness where death could be induced. and this blood illness is one of them. its intentionally killing oneself in a slow manner or over a period of time. i dont think God will buy that argument. the fact remains one did not take care or appreciate the gift of life. thats what makes suicide sinful right?
anyway, point is, i think my blood condition is better. my doctor still wants me to have occassional blood tests to monitor my blood viscosity just to make sure her diagnosis is correct. im tempted not to follow that instruction after the baguio trip since i think im doing ok. i dont even experience drowsiness as often as before. so, i might add it to my new year's resolution: be nice to doctors. im like the worst patient a doctor can have. i dont show up for check-ups and i dont listen. i disregard instructions. so i might post my new year's resolution to make it binding (or maybe for purposes of accountability)
Wednesday, December 26, 2007
worst christmas ever
i think people dont understand why im so bothered with the loss of a phone. when my nokia 3660 broke down, i got very disoriented. it was as if the natural order of things was disturbed. its because im so attached to my cellphone. its always the first thing i look for in the morning and the last thing i see before i sleep (most days). its always within arms reach (again, most days). i even take it with me when i take a shower (sometimes)
thats why i was very pissed when my new phone (a nokia 3110 classic. same features as my nokia 3660 and then some. yes, and then some. i was supposed to write a review but i decided to wait a little. its a good thing i did because i would have written a review that would make the phone almost perfect where its only flaw was its camera) crashed 2 hours before christmas. i can hear the comic book guy from the simpsons saying "worst timing ever". and its exactly one full month old when it decided to crash. how nice. i abused it during the first few days to test it and have it replaced in case it breaks down and it passed the test (only in terms of usage. so i didnt drop it or hit it with a hammer). now that its a month old, when i least expected it, it decided to break down. exactly one month. and i was listening to the BrewRats when it broke (the BrewRats: DJ Angel, Tado and Ramon Bautista, on 99.5 Hit FM (formerly 99.5 RT). monday to thursday, 9pm to 12 midnight. its a really nice and funny radio show. i dont listen to FM because i find the DJs annoying, but this show is an exception and i dont listen to this FM show to listen to music, i just want to listen to the DJs)
anyway, its been my habit to greet people a little past midnight every christmas. this is how i greet people every year since 2000. and i was expecting to do the same this year. thats why i didnt reply yet to those who greeted and texted. and i was also a bit busy because i did my christmas shopping on the 24th (second time i did this. its shopping with a time limit. and i have to remind myself to wear comfortable shoes next time i do some last minute xmas shopping because what i used made me want to buy a wheelchair). thats why its convenient for me to text everyone im going to greet a few minutes after midnight. aside from just group sending some messages, im also just sitting somewhere in the room eating (we dont use the dining table because we celebrate christmas as a clan. so every year, i have to look for a nice corner or place to eat. im not the type who likes to chat while eating. im a serious "eater"). its really a convenient time to text people. its less confusing. so when my phone crashed around 10 pm, again, i got disoriented. i was so bothered that i was no longer in the mood for christmas. so i just slept instead of getting pissed until midnight. i could have borrowed a phone but my contacts are stored in the phone memory (and this time i have a backup in my pc but i cant back it up until the phone's repaired). midnight came and im still bothered with my broken phone. i got more annoyed whenever someone talks about text messages and cellphones. so i decided to sleep after i ate and get my gifts. i was so pissed and bothered that i didnt even open a single present/gift i got. i just collected them and placed it on my chair (im very possessive).
when i woke up in the morning, my first concern was still my phone (my mother had to remind me i havent opened my gifts). we were supposed to go to my uncle's house but im still not in the mood for christmas. not with a broken phone. so i went to the mall to have it repaired first. well, the nokia care center was so nice. so nice that it decided not to hold any office so its employees can enjoy christmas. cant blame nokia for that huh? thats a very good labor practice and it didnt work in favor of the customer. its christmas and they do deserve the break. im the unreasonable one. and its only the nokia care center that did that. the nokia store in trinoma was open but unfortunately, the nokia store is different from the nokia care center (i mean, all nokia care centers can be nokia stores but not all nokia stores are nokia care centers). because of that, instead of going to my relative's house, i decided to head home instead and sleep some more. i cant go and spend christmas and stay upset all day long. anyway, i woke up around night time and was still bothered that christmas day is about to end and my phone still isnt fixed.
after 24 hours with my non-functioning phone, im feeling a bit better. but if tomorrow the nokia care person tells me that the problem isnt covered by the warranty, im going to be so pissed im going to make a scene. maybe use my new knife i got from baguio and randomly point it at anyone. then wait for the security guard to tell me to put the knife down while pointing at me his never been used pistol. why make a scene? because it would mean i waited for nothing. it could have been repaired by some cellphone repair guy. but the cellphone repair guy told me that the problem is covered by the nokia care warranty (it was really nice of the cellphone repair guy to recommend availing of the nokia care warranty). thats why i decided to wait another day.
thats why i was very pissed when my new phone (a nokia 3110 classic. same features as my nokia 3660 and then some. yes, and then some. i was supposed to write a review but i decided to wait a little. its a good thing i did because i would have written a review that would make the phone almost perfect where its only flaw was its camera) crashed 2 hours before christmas. i can hear the comic book guy from the simpsons saying "worst timing ever". and its exactly one full month old when it decided to crash. how nice. i abused it during the first few days to test it and have it replaced in case it breaks down and it passed the test (only in terms of usage. so i didnt drop it or hit it with a hammer). now that its a month old, when i least expected it, it decided to break down. exactly one month. and i was listening to the BrewRats when it broke (the BrewRats: DJ Angel, Tado and Ramon Bautista, on 99.5 Hit FM (formerly 99.5 RT). monday to thursday, 9pm to 12 midnight. its a really nice and funny radio show. i dont listen to FM because i find the DJs annoying, but this show is an exception and i dont listen to this FM show to listen to music, i just want to listen to the DJs)
anyway, its been my habit to greet people a little past midnight every christmas. this is how i greet people every year since 2000. and i was expecting to do the same this year. thats why i didnt reply yet to those who greeted and texted. and i was also a bit busy because i did my christmas shopping on the 24th (second time i did this. its shopping with a time limit. and i have to remind myself to wear comfortable shoes next time i do some last minute xmas shopping because what i used made me want to buy a wheelchair). thats why its convenient for me to text everyone im going to greet a few minutes after midnight. aside from just group sending some messages, im also just sitting somewhere in the room eating (we dont use the dining table because we celebrate christmas as a clan. so every year, i have to look for a nice corner or place to eat. im not the type who likes to chat while eating. im a serious "eater"). its really a convenient time to text people. its less confusing. so when my phone crashed around 10 pm, again, i got disoriented. i was so bothered that i was no longer in the mood for christmas. so i just slept instead of getting pissed until midnight. i could have borrowed a phone but my contacts are stored in the phone memory (and this time i have a backup in my pc but i cant back it up until the phone's repaired). midnight came and im still bothered with my broken phone. i got more annoyed whenever someone talks about text messages and cellphones. so i decided to sleep after i ate and get my gifts. i was so pissed and bothered that i didnt even open a single present/gift i got. i just collected them and placed it on my chair (im very possessive).
when i woke up in the morning, my first concern was still my phone (my mother had to remind me i havent opened my gifts). we were supposed to go to my uncle's house but im still not in the mood for christmas. not with a broken phone. so i went to the mall to have it repaired first. well, the nokia care center was so nice. so nice that it decided not to hold any office so its employees can enjoy christmas. cant blame nokia for that huh? thats a very good labor practice and it didnt work in favor of the customer. its christmas and they do deserve the break. im the unreasonable one. and its only the nokia care center that did that. the nokia store in trinoma was open but unfortunately, the nokia store is different from the nokia care center (i mean, all nokia care centers can be nokia stores but not all nokia stores are nokia care centers). because of that, instead of going to my relative's house, i decided to head home instead and sleep some more. i cant go and spend christmas and stay upset all day long. anyway, i woke up around night time and was still bothered that christmas day is about to end and my phone still isnt fixed.
after 24 hours with my non-functioning phone, im feeling a bit better. but if tomorrow the nokia care person tells me that the problem isnt covered by the warranty, im going to be so pissed im going to make a scene. maybe use my new knife i got from baguio and randomly point it at anyone. then wait for the security guard to tell me to put the knife down while pointing at me his never been used pistol. why make a scene? because it would mean i waited for nothing. it could have been repaired by some cellphone repair guy. but the cellphone repair guy told me that the problem is covered by the nokia care warranty (it was really nice of the cellphone repair guy to recommend availing of the nokia care warranty). thats why i decided to wait another day.
Sunday, November 25, 2007
RIP my nokia 3660 (february 2004-november 2007)
i still cant get over the loss of my nokia 3660. it was really unexpected. or maybe not. its been malfunctioning for months. but that was because of its memory card and not really the phone. but then again, the reason (i think) why it finally broke down was memory-related. i switched to its phone memory and it probably reached its limit. and so it finally decided that it cant take any more messages and it decided to shut down for good. so it really was the phone. anyway, i really feel bad about it.
it may not be the best phone but its been with me for quite some time. i have lots of memories with it (graduation, baguio, albay, puerto galera, law school entrance exams, etc). i had it since late february 2004 as a replacement for my first phone, my nokia 3210, which broke a few weeks prior (recurrent battery problem). i didnt feel as bad then (regarding the loss of my 1st phone) because although i loved my nokia 3210, i felt it's no longer as good as most of the phones during that time. so when my nokia 3210 broke, i felt it was time for it to go. it served me well (if i remember correctly, it was functional from december 1999 to january 2004).
anyway, let me just narrate the last day of my nokia 3660, november 20, 2007:
the day was as ordinary as any other day. it was a tuesday and i had a specpro class and an agency class. the agency class ended and my blockmate (guess who) just talked with our new seatmate. she was some kind of an exchange student required to take a class in our college. and since she's not familiar with how things are done in our college, my blockmate decided to help her a little. so i tagged along and helped her too.
not having the readings for our agency class, i lent her my copy so she could have it photocopied. unfortunately, it was taking quite some time to have the readings photocopied so we decided to come back for it later (actually, the photocopier broke down when it was her turn). she asked for my number so she could text me when she's about to return the readings to me. after that, we went our separate ways to mind our own businesses and my blockmate and i went to lunch (beach haus). there i remembered that my phone's battery is running low, with one bar left. so if she was going to text me, she better do it soon or she might as well return it on thursday, the next class meeting. i didnt ask for her number because i was expecting her to return it to me soon so i thought, if she's going to text me, im going to get her number anyway. i wont have to bother asking for it
i was supposed to have another class that day (medjur) by 6pm. so i stayed in the library and read some locgov readings while waiting for that 6pm class. while reading locgov, i received a text message from luningning. just a couple of forwarded messages. i found it a little surprising because she hasnt texted me for quite some time and the timing is a little bad because im trying to conserve my phone battery. an hour later or maybe more, i received another text message, announcing that we will not have the 6pm class. ok, thats a relief. aside from no class, at least my phone battery has not gone empty. there i realized how stupid i was. if i asked our new seatmate her phone number, i could have told her that she could return it to me some other day and that my phone battery is running low. anyway, i waited til 6pm since ive told her i have a 6pm class (and besides, im just going to the mall, so im not really in a hurry). i waited and 6pm came. no text message. 6:09 came, i decided to ride the jeepney to go to the mall and have my dinner (but i already have a hunch she's going to text me the moment i ride a jeepney). a few minutes later, she texted, asking me where i was. it was 6:15. nice timing. i asked her where she was and thats when my phone finally had enough. it shut itself off. i thought it was just another empty battery. but when i got home an hour or more later, it wasnt charging. tried borrowing my brother's battery, it wasnt switching on. by that time, i knew it was broken but i was still hoping i could have it repaired. only the day after, when i went to the mall to have it repaired, that i finally knew that it was gone. the repairman said it would cost about P2.5K to have it repaired. might as well get a new phone if that would be the damage, right? so there. that was the last remaining moments of my nokia 3660. there might still be a possibility to have it repaired but it might not even last that long anyway. and its almost outdated. not yet obsolete. just outdated
so my nokia 3660, thanks for all the memories.
it may not be the best phone but its been with me for quite some time. i have lots of memories with it (graduation, baguio, albay, puerto galera, law school entrance exams, etc). i had it since late february 2004 as a replacement for my first phone, my nokia 3210, which broke a few weeks prior (recurrent battery problem). i didnt feel as bad then (regarding the loss of my 1st phone) because although i loved my nokia 3210, i felt it's no longer as good as most of the phones during that time. so when my nokia 3210 broke, i felt it was time for it to go. it served me well (if i remember correctly, it was functional from december 1999 to january 2004).
anyway, let me just narrate the last day of my nokia 3660, november 20, 2007:
the day was as ordinary as any other day. it was a tuesday and i had a specpro class and an agency class. the agency class ended and my blockmate (guess who) just talked with our new seatmate. she was some kind of an exchange student required to take a class in our college. and since she's not familiar with how things are done in our college, my blockmate decided to help her a little. so i tagged along and helped her too.
not having the readings for our agency class, i lent her my copy so she could have it photocopied. unfortunately, it was taking quite some time to have the readings photocopied so we decided to come back for it later (actually, the photocopier broke down when it was her turn). she asked for my number so she could text me when she's about to return the readings to me. after that, we went our separate ways to mind our own businesses and my blockmate and i went to lunch (beach haus). there i remembered that my phone's battery is running low, with one bar left. so if she was going to text me, she better do it soon or she might as well return it on thursday, the next class meeting. i didnt ask for her number because i was expecting her to return it to me soon so i thought, if she's going to text me, im going to get her number anyway. i wont have to bother asking for it
i was supposed to have another class that day (medjur) by 6pm. so i stayed in the library and read some locgov readings while waiting for that 6pm class. while reading locgov, i received a text message from luningning. just a couple of forwarded messages. i found it a little surprising because she hasnt texted me for quite some time and the timing is a little bad because im trying to conserve my phone battery. an hour later or maybe more, i received another text message, announcing that we will not have the 6pm class. ok, thats a relief. aside from no class, at least my phone battery has not gone empty. there i realized how stupid i was. if i asked our new seatmate her phone number, i could have told her that she could return it to me some other day and that my phone battery is running low. anyway, i waited til 6pm since ive told her i have a 6pm class (and besides, im just going to the mall, so im not really in a hurry). i waited and 6pm came. no text message. 6:09 came, i decided to ride the jeepney to go to the mall and have my dinner (but i already have a hunch she's going to text me the moment i ride a jeepney). a few minutes later, she texted, asking me where i was. it was 6:15. nice timing. i asked her where she was and thats when my phone finally had enough. it shut itself off. i thought it was just another empty battery. but when i got home an hour or more later, it wasnt charging. tried borrowing my brother's battery, it wasnt switching on. by that time, i knew it was broken but i was still hoping i could have it repaired. only the day after, when i went to the mall to have it repaired, that i finally knew that it was gone. the repairman said it would cost about P2.5K to have it repaired. might as well get a new phone if that would be the damage, right? so there. that was the last remaining moments of my nokia 3660. there might still be a possibility to have it repaired but it might not even last that long anyway. and its almost outdated. not yet obsolete. just outdated
so my nokia 3660, thanks for all the memories.
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
another one of em bad days!
i just had a really bad day. i dont know why. its an unfortunate day similar to the august ones. the day started well. i had an 8am class and even if i left the house a little past 730am, i wasnt late and made it to class before the professor got there. so it was a good start. then i was able to read a little for my 1030am class and things went well there too. and from there, things just became, well, ugly. after that class, we accompanied a classmate to photocopy some assigned readings. since it was taking some time to have the readings photocopied in the 3rd floor library, we decided to go have it photocopied in another photocopying booth. but instead of getting it done quicker, the photocopier for some reason appeared to have broken down when it was our turn. so, that unfortunate event number one. then when i was about to have lunch, the viand i ordered spilt. why? i was just careless i guess. and i almost spilt it again when i was paying for the food i just ordered. was that still carelessness? i dont think so. its a sign of inevitable bad things to come! so that's unfortunate event number two. and then i went back to malcolm hall since i have a 6pm class. i decided to use the free time to study. so i went to my locker to get some readings. while taking out the readings, i scraped my finger on the side of my locker. unfortunate event number three. then, i studied in the library while waiting for 6pm but the 6pm class was cancelled a few hours before the class was supposed to start. unfortunate event number four since i waited in the library for nothing. ok, at least i studied. and then i was waiting for a text message from a classmate because she borrowed my readings. and i only have one bar of battery left. when she texted me i just got on a jeepney and since i wasnt far from malcolm hall, i decided to get off. as i got off, i texted her asking where she is and thats when my cellphone's battery went empty. ok, just got off the jeep, not knowing how to contact her, i decided to go back to malcolm hall, thinking she might be there. she's not. and i have no idea what she replied to my text message. i just wasted my jeepney ride. unfortunate event number five. and then i went to burger king to eat my dinner. i decided to order a burger i havent tried before. i didnt like it. nice way to end the day. thats unfortunate event number six. and when i got home, i charged my cellphone only to find out its broken! crap! its not charging and i cant switch it on. ultimate unfortunate event! and thats unfortunate event number seven. and then, i placed my sim card in my mother's cellphone and learned that i have a class tomorrow which was cancelled yesterday. the unfortunate events have not ended (and thats number eight) and now, im writing this. so far, no unfortunate event number nine. im hoping that tomorrow will be a good day. please, let it be a good day.
actually, what made the day as bad as the august ones was the fact that my cellphone's broken and the timing it broke down. i really need my cellphone right now. not a cellphone, my cellphone. all my contacts are there, plus scheds and reminders.
actually, what made the day as bad as the august ones was the fact that my cellphone's broken and the timing it broke down. i really need my cellphone right now. not a cellphone, my cellphone. all my contacts are there, plus scheds and reminders.
Sunday, November 11, 2007
is it too much to ask?
im just tired. probably. or not in the mood. most likely, im sick of it. it just so happens that i dont want to play that game anymore.
i guess this is how some actors/actresses feel if they are recognized only in one sucessful film, or probably the same frustrating feeling for some authors being known only for one particular book they authored (duh!). i think tobey maguire's sick of being known only as spider-man or jason biggs as that guy who fucked the pie. they have other movies, but i think people pester them with that particular movie that launched their careers and they hope that it wont last a lifetime because if they take acting seriously, they would like to be recognized in other roles they've played. the fact that they only remind people of one role probably makes them feel that they are seen as having limited acting capabilities or some no-talent one hit wonder. maybe they get that same frustrating feeling ive just had a few days ago.
its really tiring to put up with something that you dont enjoy anymore. sure it was fun at first but how the hell should i know it would last this long (i think there's something grammatically wrong here, but what the hell). its like a very stale "knock-knock" joke that you hear every single day. i cant force myself to laugh forever now can i? unfortunately for me, people arent tired of it yet. thats easy for them because theyre just mere spectators to an act i dont want to do anymore. i mean, what the crap do i have to do to make things clear that im not interested to do the stupid act or whatever it should be called. ive been waiting for people to drop it but some just dont want to and some just dont get it. or maybe they just dont care.
i guess this is how some actors/actresses feel if they are recognized only in one sucessful film, or probably the same frustrating feeling for some authors being known only for one particular book they authored (duh!). i think tobey maguire's sick of being known only as spider-man or jason biggs as that guy who fucked the pie. they have other movies, but i think people pester them with that particular movie that launched their careers and they hope that it wont last a lifetime because if they take acting seriously, they would like to be recognized in other roles they've played. the fact that they only remind people of one role probably makes them feel that they are seen as having limited acting capabilities or some no-talent one hit wonder. maybe they get that same frustrating feeling ive just had a few days ago.
its really tiring to put up with something that you dont enjoy anymore. sure it was fun at first but how the hell should i know it would last this long (i think there's something grammatically wrong here, but what the hell). its like a very stale "knock-knock" joke that you hear every single day. i cant force myself to laugh forever now can i? unfortunately for me, people arent tired of it yet. thats easy for them because theyre just mere spectators to an act i dont want to do anymore. i mean, what the crap do i have to do to make things clear that im not interested to do the stupid act or whatever it should be called. ive been waiting for people to drop it but some just dont want to and some just dont get it. or maybe they just dont care.
behind blue eyes
No one knows what it's like
To be the bad man
To be the sad man
Behind blue eyes
And no one knows
What it's like to be hated
To be fated to telling only lies
But my dreams they aren't as empty
As my conscience seems to be
I have hours, only lonely
My love is vengeance
That's never free
No one knows what its like
To feel these feelings
Like i do, and i blame you!
No one bites back as hard
On their anger
None of my pain and woe
Can show through
No one knows what its like
To be mistreated, to be defeated
Behind blue eyes
No one knows how to say
That they're sorry and don't worry
I'm not telling lies
When my fist clenches, crack it open
Before I use it and lose my cool
When I smile, tell me some bad news
Before I laugh and act like a fool
If I swallow anything evil
Put your finger down my throat
If I shiver, please give me a blanket
Keep me warm, let me wear your coat
No one knows what its like
To be the bad man, to be the sad man
Behind blue eyes.
To be the bad man
To be the sad man
Behind blue eyes
And no one knows
What it's like to be hated
To be fated to telling only lies
But my dreams they aren't as empty
As my conscience seems to be
I have hours, only lonely
My love is vengeance
That's never free
No one knows what its like
To feel these feelings
Like i do, and i blame you!
No one bites back as hard
On their anger
None of my pain and woe
Can show through
No one knows what its like
To be mistreated, to be defeated
Behind blue eyes
No one knows how to say
That they're sorry and don't worry
I'm not telling lies
When my fist clenches, crack it open
Before I use it and lose my cool
When I smile, tell me some bad news
Before I laugh and act like a fool
If I swallow anything evil
Put your finger down my throat
If I shiver, please give me a blanket
Keep me warm, let me wear your coat
No one knows what its like
To be the bad man, to be the sad man
Behind blue eyes.
Monday, November 05, 2007
Fifth of November
-
- Remember, remember the Fifth of November,
- The Gunpowder Treason and Plot,
- I know of no reason
- Why Gunpowder Treason
- Should ever be forgot.
- Guy Fawkes, Guy Fawkes, t'was his intent
- To blow up King and Parliament.
- Three-score barrels of powder below
- To prove old England's overthrow;
- By God's providence he was catch'd
- With a dark lantern and burning match.
- Holloa boys, holloa boys, let the bells ring.
- Holloa boys, holloa boys, God save the King!
Saturday, October 27, 2007
self-centered
my blog entry titles lack creativity. better work on that...someday
am i self-centered? yes i am. very self-centered. but not because im self-centered means im selfish. i care about other people's welfare and i can be selfless from time to time. i think being selfish is more of an external act while being self-centered is more of an internal thing. not mutually exclusive though. the external act could be a reflection of one's state of mind and the internal...ummm...whatchamacallit may manifest in the external world. point is, just writing this blog entry just shows im self-centered. i could be writing about the presidential pardon given to Estrada. i have a degree in political science and im a law student, i should be affected by it and should be giving some thought on this news item. well, since i brought this topic up, might as well talk a little about it (just a little because i am writing about how self-centered i am. actually not really. it just so happens i cant sleep and i felt like writing about my being self-centered). where was i? oh yeah, the presidential pardon. i have nothing against giving Estrada the presidential pardon as long as Arroyo has a good reason for it. and for me, reconciliation and unity really isnt enough to qualify as a good and jutifiiable reason to give a presidential pardon at this moment. but then again, who am i to say that isnt enough, im not the one sitting in Malacanang feeling the pressure (or fully knowledgeable of the consequences. its not like everything we see on TV is really "everything" or really true). Arroyo cites similar situations regarding pardon in other countries but not because other countries did it means we should follow it. but then again, Estrada's been in detention for six years. so what? well, that is a long time isnt it? but it seems its too soon to give the presidential pardon. it makes the Estrada trial look like a big joke. after six long years of trial, he's free after conviction (so Estrada's lawyer should have opted to finish the trial as soon as possible and not let it extend for six years. but then again (again), maybe thats why the pardon was given, its been six years of detention before conviction). Was there even confiscation of the money plundered? maybe i should read the papers before reacting, the answers might be there. i mean, im not really updated on every detail.
why did i write about my being self-centered? i forgot. the Estrada topic distracted me. long enough to make me forget what i intended to write about. which just shows that i have a short attention span. i think. wait, i got it. im self-centered because im too absorbed and wrapped up in myself. thats it? not really. i lost my train of thought with regard to this topic. isnt this res ipsa loquitur? shouldnt be citing latin terms. im not good with using latin maxims. anyway, to support my self-centeredness, i think the next two blog entries would help. why would i want to be self-centered? because i am and i dont think there's anything bad about it. as long as it doesnt go beyond pissing people off...from time to time. besides, its not like i uncontrollably manifest my self-centeredness. i dont go around saying im such a great person. not the greatest but great nonetheless. nor do i tell people im better off not having good looks because if i was goddamn handsome, i wont notice the other people around me. wait, im not describing a self-centered person, im describing a jackass. im not yet willing to admit im a jackass.
am i self-centered? yes i am. very self-centered. but not because im self-centered means im selfish. i care about other people's welfare and i can be selfless from time to time. i think being selfish is more of an external act while being self-centered is more of an internal thing. not mutually exclusive though. the external act could be a reflection of one's state of mind and the internal...ummm...whatchamacallit may manifest in the external world. point is, just writing this blog entry just shows im self-centered. i could be writing about the presidential pardon given to Estrada. i have a degree in political science and im a law student, i should be affected by it and should be giving some thought on this news item. well, since i brought this topic up, might as well talk a little about it (just a little because i am writing about how self-centered i am. actually not really. it just so happens i cant sleep and i felt like writing about my being self-centered). where was i? oh yeah, the presidential pardon. i have nothing against giving Estrada the presidential pardon as long as Arroyo has a good reason for it. and for me, reconciliation and unity really isnt enough to qualify as a good and jutifiiable reason to give a presidential pardon at this moment. but then again, who am i to say that isnt enough, im not the one sitting in Malacanang feeling the pressure (or fully knowledgeable of the consequences. its not like everything we see on TV is really "everything" or really true). Arroyo cites similar situations regarding pardon in other countries but not because other countries did it means we should follow it. but then again, Estrada's been in detention for six years. so what? well, that is a long time isnt it? but it seems its too soon to give the presidential pardon. it makes the Estrada trial look like a big joke. after six long years of trial, he's free after conviction (so Estrada's lawyer should have opted to finish the trial as soon as possible and not let it extend for six years. but then again (again), maybe thats why the pardon was given, its been six years of detention before conviction). Was there even confiscation of the money plundered? maybe i should read the papers before reacting, the answers might be there. i mean, im not really updated on every detail.
why did i write about my being self-centered? i forgot. the Estrada topic distracted me. long enough to make me forget what i intended to write about. which just shows that i have a short attention span. i think. wait, i got it. im self-centered because im too absorbed and wrapped up in myself. thats it? not really. i lost my train of thought with regard to this topic. isnt this res ipsa loquitur? shouldnt be citing latin terms. im not good with using latin maxims. anyway, to support my self-centeredness, i think the next two blog entries would help. why would i want to be self-centered? because i am and i dont think there's anything bad about it. as long as it doesnt go beyond pissing people off...from time to time. besides, its not like i uncontrollably manifest my self-centeredness. i dont go around saying im such a great person. not the greatest but great nonetheless. nor do i tell people im better off not having good looks because if i was goddamn handsome, i wont notice the other people around me. wait, im not describing a self-centered person, im describing a jackass. im not yet willing to admit im a jackass.
Friday, October 26, 2007
tristan thorn
Tristan is a shy and somewhat awkward young man who can't help but feel that he doesn't belong in the Village of Wall. He dreams of traveling the world and reinventing himself, but most of all he dreams of Victoria Forester: the prettiest girl in the village. (from an article on tristan thorn in wikipedia)
holy fucking crap. after reading the sentence above, i just felt uneasy and a bit dizzy. i dont exactly know why but thats what i felt. did i feel its me? or the description fits me? i dont know. im not really shy, and i dont really use awkward to describe myself but somehow, i would say its close enough. maybe a first impression perhaps. about the feeling of not belonging, of traveling and reinventing one's self sort of hits the target. and of all the names, it had to be Victoria. if only people knew how much the name Victoria means to me. ive fallen in love with the name for 10 years now (maybe more, i know its late 90s. and thats probably why i started to like names that begins with the letter V). and i have a thing for liking the prettiest. just pretty isnt enough. tsk. i dont know if i can change that.
i just watched Stardust a few hours ago and i wont even think im like Tristan Thorn, but well, for some reason, i ended up reading a Wikipedia entry on him (ended up, so i didnt really purposely searched for it on wikipedia, i just saw a clickable link on Tristan Thorn and clicked on it) and well, the part i copied above sort of, well, caught my attention. now im interested in buying Neil Gaiman's novel. or maybe look for someone who has a copy and just borrow it. or maybe look for it in a book sale shop (i saw some of The Sandman comics in a book sale of some sort).
the movie Stardust didnt really catch my attention until i learned there's a character named Tristan (either im just self-centered or im just self-centered. i didnt even know he was the main character until i watched the movie). i dont think ive seen the movie's trailer either. and not knowing it was an adaptation of Neil Gaiman's novel, the movie name Stardust isnt that appealing to me. the word Stardust sounds like a dance show. or an alternative title to Will Ferell's Blades of Glory. anyway, i liked the movie. maybe it ranks fourth, next to 50 First Dates (just saw 50 First Dates last monday in Burger King) Stranger Than Fiction and Transformers. but then again, all of these movies belong to different genres so when it comes to fantasy films, it might rank first. or in live-action fantasy film category because the usual fantasy films i like are anime films. not really much of a "fantasy" type of guy. although i enjoy it i still prefer sci-fi. i would have loved the movie Stardust, even if it was purely a fantasy film, if Yvaine was Rachael Leigh Cook (or maybe Keira Knightley or Winona Ryder). Claire Danes isnt bad but im not much into Claire Danes. she has a nice name though.
holy fucking crap. after reading the sentence above, i just felt uneasy and a bit dizzy. i dont exactly know why but thats what i felt. did i feel its me? or the description fits me? i dont know. im not really shy, and i dont really use awkward to describe myself but somehow, i would say its close enough. maybe a first impression perhaps. about the feeling of not belonging, of traveling and reinventing one's self sort of hits the target. and of all the names, it had to be Victoria. if only people knew how much the name Victoria means to me. ive fallen in love with the name for 10 years now (maybe more, i know its late 90s. and thats probably why i started to like names that begins with the letter V). and i have a thing for liking the prettiest. just pretty isnt enough. tsk. i dont know if i can change that.
i just watched Stardust a few hours ago and i wont even think im like Tristan Thorn, but well, for some reason, i ended up reading a Wikipedia entry on him (ended up, so i didnt really purposely searched for it on wikipedia, i just saw a clickable link on Tristan Thorn and clicked on it) and well, the part i copied above sort of, well, caught my attention. now im interested in buying Neil Gaiman's novel. or maybe look for someone who has a copy and just borrow it. or maybe look for it in a book sale shop (i saw some of The Sandman comics in a book sale of some sort).
the movie Stardust didnt really catch my attention until i learned there's a character named Tristan (either im just self-centered or im just self-centered. i didnt even know he was the main character until i watched the movie). i dont think ive seen the movie's trailer either. and not knowing it was an adaptation of Neil Gaiman's novel, the movie name Stardust isnt that appealing to me. the word Stardust sounds like a dance show. or an alternative title to Will Ferell's Blades of Glory. anyway, i liked the movie. maybe it ranks fourth, next to 50 First Dates (just saw 50 First Dates last monday in Burger King) Stranger Than Fiction and Transformers. but then again, all of these movies belong to different genres so when it comes to fantasy films, it might rank first. or in live-action fantasy film category because the usual fantasy films i like are anime films. not really much of a "fantasy" type of guy. although i enjoy it i still prefer sci-fi. i would have loved the movie Stardust, even if it was purely a fantasy film, if Yvaine was Rachael Leigh Cook (or maybe Keira Knightley or Winona Ryder). Claire Danes isnt bad but im not much into Claire Danes. she has a nice name though.
Wednesday, October 03, 2007
rain
thank God for the rain! i love it when it rains. not that im only happy when it rains because its not impossible for me to be happy on a non-rainy day but a rainy day (or a rainy night more especially) most likely cheers me up or at least puts me in a good mood. of course that doesnt mean i wont be in a bad mood when its raining but somehow, the rain does help in improving my mood (most of the time). maybe its because of the cold weather it brings. also, im not talking about heavy rains. obviously. that would be heartless of me to want heavy rains because of the destructive nature of such rains. but then again i am heartless but not to the point of being inconsiderate with other people's welfare. people lose not only property but also lives with extremely heavy rain. and there is a difference between the two, being heartless and being considerate. they are not mutually exclusive. i mean, i could be heartless because i dont have pity nor feelings of sympathy or compassion but that doesnt mean i cant be considerate. for me, being considerate is more of a rational act. i see it as a knowledge of the needs and feelings of other people and taking that into consideration in one's actions or in making decisions.
going back to the topic, im talking about light to moderate rain or a simple drizzle. lately, it rains whenever i step out of a building, whether it be at home or in school. of course, there are times its a bit annoying because the rain is too heavy to walk under. i prefer rains thats not strong enough to get a person too wet.
i noticed that other people are "afraid" to get wet. sometimes its a very light rain and they still have to grab their umbrellas. i rarely use my umbrella. i only bring one so that i have something to use in case of "emergencies". what are these "emergencies"? if i have paper to submit (which is already due or on the day of the deadline of course, because its really extremely rare or as far as im concerned, really unheard of, for someone to submit a paper or a requirement a day before the deadline) and all of a sudden God decides to put up an "obstacle course". it suddenly rains very hard and there's no taxi in sight for almost an hour. i have to ride a jeepney but the jeepney that takes the easiest/quickest route is also unavailable. so i have to ride several jeepneys instead. and all throughout, it was raining really really hard. an umbrella would come really handy so that my paper wont be a soggy piece of crap when i submit it. why dont i just print it in school? well, God decides to make things more difficult. there was a blackout one hour before the deadline. so i have no option but to bring the hardcopy i already have. another example of an emergency is when it starts to rain really hard and you see a pretty girl that despite the hotness she possesses, cant make the rain evaporate before it hits her beautiful skin and she has no where to run to. so the umbrella would come in handy to rescue her from getting wet. but if it was only a light rain, dont bother. it wont kill her. if she cant stand light rain, she doesnt deserve to be rescued from it. i mean, how weak can a person be not to take a drizzle? ok, fine. maybe some people are too delicate to handle even the weakest of raindrops but still a little rain shouldnt hurt. thats why i rarely use my umbrella unless its really necessary. how about getting sick? maybe ive caught the cold from time to time because of walking in the rain but most of the time, i dont. so, why not walk in the rain? if its because its wet, then thats what i dont get. so what if its wet? maybe i just worry too less.
another thing i like about the rain is its disruptive nature. it disrupts the life of the unprepared. if you are commuting and it rains and you dont have an umbrella, sometimes you find yourself in a place you didnt plan to be or you get delayed. it disrupts the ordinary course of things, for those who didnt take into consideration the possibility of rain. sometimes the rain could make a person spend more either in terms of money (take the taxi instead or eat in a fastfood and wait for the rain to stop or buy an umbrella) or in terms of time (if you are stranded, you have to use your time for something else or well, waste it if there's nothing productive that can be done). so the rain is a disruption of the daily routine or the ordinary course or daily life of the people within the society or particular area who didnt have the rain and its effects in their plan for the day. why do i like it? well, because the disruption makes people stop and think for a while. i mean, if a person is too absorbed in what he is supposed to do or is in too deep in his daily routine, the rain most of the time is effective in breaking that person's routine and makes him think for a while what to do or reconsider stuff. its like a break from the monotony of daily life. of course, if it rains very often, a day with no rain would have the same effect. but since days with no rain is more of the norm, rainy days have more of the effect of being a break from the monotony of daily life. also, the disruption could be of such magnitude that could change the course of one's life. like i said, the rain could send a person to place he didnt intend to be (or be prevented from going to a place he intends to be) or the rain could take one's time and spend it for some other thing (like one's time is re-allocated suddenly).
so aside from the nice weather it brings, the rain is really an interesting thing.
going back to the topic, im talking about light to moderate rain or a simple drizzle. lately, it rains whenever i step out of a building, whether it be at home or in school. of course, there are times its a bit annoying because the rain is too heavy to walk under. i prefer rains thats not strong enough to get a person too wet.
i noticed that other people are "afraid" to get wet. sometimes its a very light rain and they still have to grab their umbrellas. i rarely use my umbrella. i only bring one so that i have something to use in case of "emergencies". what are these "emergencies"? if i have paper to submit (which is already due or on the day of the deadline of course, because its really extremely rare or as far as im concerned, really unheard of, for someone to submit a paper or a requirement a day before the deadline) and all of a sudden God decides to put up an "obstacle course". it suddenly rains very hard and there's no taxi in sight for almost an hour. i have to ride a jeepney but the jeepney that takes the easiest/quickest route is also unavailable. so i have to ride several jeepneys instead. and all throughout, it was raining really really hard. an umbrella would come really handy so that my paper wont be a soggy piece of crap when i submit it. why dont i just print it in school? well, God decides to make things more difficult. there was a blackout one hour before the deadline. so i have no option but to bring the hardcopy i already have. another example of an emergency is when it starts to rain really hard and you see a pretty girl that despite the hotness she possesses, cant make the rain evaporate before it hits her beautiful skin and she has no where to run to. so the umbrella would come in handy to rescue her from getting wet. but if it was only a light rain, dont bother. it wont kill her. if she cant stand light rain, she doesnt deserve to be rescued from it. i mean, how weak can a person be not to take a drizzle? ok, fine. maybe some people are too delicate to handle even the weakest of raindrops but still a little rain shouldnt hurt. thats why i rarely use my umbrella unless its really necessary. how about getting sick? maybe ive caught the cold from time to time because of walking in the rain but most of the time, i dont. so, why not walk in the rain? if its because its wet, then thats what i dont get. so what if its wet? maybe i just worry too less.
another thing i like about the rain is its disruptive nature. it disrupts the life of the unprepared. if you are commuting and it rains and you dont have an umbrella, sometimes you find yourself in a place you didnt plan to be or you get delayed. it disrupts the ordinary course of things, for those who didnt take into consideration the possibility of rain. sometimes the rain could make a person spend more either in terms of money (take the taxi instead or eat in a fastfood and wait for the rain to stop or buy an umbrella) or in terms of time (if you are stranded, you have to use your time for something else or well, waste it if there's nothing productive that can be done). so the rain is a disruption of the daily routine or the ordinary course or daily life of the people within the society or particular area who didnt have the rain and its effects in their plan for the day. why do i like it? well, because the disruption makes people stop and think for a while. i mean, if a person is too absorbed in what he is supposed to do or is in too deep in his daily routine, the rain most of the time is effective in breaking that person's routine and makes him think for a while what to do or reconsider stuff. its like a break from the monotony of daily life. of course, if it rains very often, a day with no rain would have the same effect. but since days with no rain is more of the norm, rainy days have more of the effect of being a break from the monotony of daily life. also, the disruption could be of such magnitude that could change the course of one's life. like i said, the rain could send a person to place he didnt intend to be (or be prevented from going to a place he intends to be) or the rain could take one's time and spend it for some other thing (like one's time is re-allocated suddenly).
so aside from the nice weather it brings, the rain is really an interesting thing.
Monday, October 01, 2007
october has landed
ock as in doc ock (short for doctor octopus, one of the famous villains in marvel comics, specifically, enemy of spider-man), tow as in tow truck and bur as in burlap (a cloth of some sort). put them together and we have, ocktowbur.
whenever i hear october, i remember 50 First Dates. why? because there was a part in the movie where Lucy Whitmore was insisting it was october and the way she said it somehow got "etched" in my mind. ock-tow-bur. its like whenever i hear bruce willis, its like being asked to complete a sentence. bruce willis? is a ghost! some people complained about this one. they said the movie spoiled The Sixth Sense.
anyway, i was in the mall a few hours ago (as usual) to eat dinner and check the prices of coffee makers. and when i reached the basement, i was a bit surprised that on the first day of october, the mall was already selling christmas trees and christmas decors and playing christmas songs. this was done only in the basement so the "christmassy" (most likely this word doesnt exist but if does, i might have spelled it wrong) atmosphere wont be felt in the entire mall. i was just there last saturday and as far as i remember, those trees of western origin werent there. so i guess starting to sell stuff for the christmas season was scheduled this first day of october (unless they started it yesterday, september 30. i didnt go to the mall yesterday). why am i making a big deal out of it? its just i didnt even feel september that much. i mean, august as always was unforgettable but i couldnt remember what stuff happened last september. and now its october already and the mall is making people realize christmas is coming. its another year coming to an end! time flies even if youre not having fun. time flies also for those who need a lot of it.
thats it? yep. i just wanted to blog about seeing christmas trees as early as the first day of october. i know i shouldnt be surprised since i think the christmas season starts this early in this country (i think) but, well, i was still surprised that the malls are preparing for the christmas season.
whenever i hear october, i remember 50 First Dates. why? because there was a part in the movie where Lucy Whitmore was insisting it was october and the way she said it somehow got "etched" in my mind. ock-tow-bur. its like whenever i hear bruce willis, its like being asked to complete a sentence. bruce willis? is a ghost! some people complained about this one. they said the movie spoiled The Sixth Sense.
anyway, i was in the mall a few hours ago (as usual) to eat dinner and check the prices of coffee makers. and when i reached the basement, i was a bit surprised that on the first day of october, the mall was already selling christmas trees and christmas decors and playing christmas songs. this was done only in the basement so the "christmassy" (most likely this word doesnt exist but if does, i might have spelled it wrong) atmosphere wont be felt in the entire mall. i was just there last saturday and as far as i remember, those trees of western origin werent there. so i guess starting to sell stuff for the christmas season was scheduled this first day of october (unless they started it yesterday, september 30. i didnt go to the mall yesterday). why am i making a big deal out of it? its just i didnt even feel september that much. i mean, august as always was unforgettable but i couldnt remember what stuff happened last september. and now its october already and the mall is making people realize christmas is coming. its another year coming to an end! time flies even if youre not having fun. time flies also for those who need a lot of it.
thats it? yep. i just wanted to blog about seeing christmas trees as early as the first day of october. i know i shouldnt be surprised since i think the christmas season starts this early in this country (i think) but, well, i was still surprised that the malls are preparing for the christmas season.
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
i think im in a tragedy
just watched Stranger Than Fiction (on video) yesterday starring Will Ferrell, Maggie Gyllenhaal, Emma Thompson and Dustin Hoffman. i thought it was a comedy because its a Will Ferrell movie. so i was a bit surprised when the guy in Video City told me it was in the drama section when i asked if they had a copy of the movie. and the reason i thought of renting it was because i saw its trailer in one of the videos i rented (i watch the trailers so i know which movies to rent next). and after watching the movie, i cant believe i didnt notice this movie when it was released in cinemas (but i watched the piece of crap of a movie Pathfinder. since then, i research on the movie before watching it). i checked IMDb and it said it was just released last January 24. where was i then? why didnt i notice this movie? obviously, i loved Stranger than Fiction after watching it on video.
although its not really a comedy, Will Ferrell's character is fun to watch and to a certain extent funny but he doesnt ruin the seriousness that the movie is supposed to have. i mean, all he has to do is be this plain guy with a plain life. but of course, his life became interesting when all of a sudden he hears the voice of a person narrating his life and realizes that he might be a character in a story. the thing is, i think the idea of this movie is very original because i havent seen anything like it. there might be similar ones or similar themes but not close enough to really think that this movie is like this movie or worse its a rip off of another movie.
the character Will Ferrell played reminded me of me, in a shallow sense of course. i dont hear a voice narrating my life but i also counted brush strokes but not the same number as his brush strokes. i wear my wrist watch on my right wrist and i also have an attachment to my wristwatch. and when i watched the movie, my wristwatch just stopped the day before. also, im pretty much a solitary type of guy (which is different from a loner. im both). thats it. its really shallow similarities.
also, the movie gave me a way of explaining my life (of course not in its entirety because im not harold crick/will ferrell's character). before i dont know how to put into words the explanation why i live my life. but somehow the movie was able to state it in a way thats a bit of an appropriate description. so here it is: my life is lived in a way that i refuse to let the plot continue because i might be in a tragedy and not a comedy. of course, the only way of finding out is by taking the next step. and thats just it, i dont want to take the next step until i get an idea where i am exactly. not that im worried of the ending. regardless of whether its a comedy or a tragedy, the ending isnt something to worry about. its how you get there, especially if its a tragedy. its what happens before the ending that worries me. so thats why i dont complain (not much) that im "stuck" in this part of my life because i intentionally refuse to let the plot unfold. or at least let the plot move slower than its supposed to be, to the point it might not be attuned to the rest of what its supposed to be connected with. the movie didnt cover this part of my life that could put into words the idea i have which is somehow related to my own understanding of karma.
Quotes from the movie:
This is a story about a man named Harold Crick and his wristwatch. Harold Crick was a man of infinite numbers, endless calculations, and remarkably few words. And his wristwatch said even less. Every weekday, for twelve years, Harold would brush each of his thirty-two teeth seventy-six times. Thirty-eight times back and forth, thirty-eight times up and down. Every weekday, for twelve years, Harold would tie his tie in a single Windsor knot instead of the double, thereby saving up to forty-three seconds. His wristwatch thought the single Windsor made his neck look fat, but said nothing. - Kay Eiffel as the Narrator
Anarchists have a group?...They assemble?...Wouldn't that completely defeat the purpose? - Ana Pascal
What is wrong with you? Hey, I don't want to eat nothing but pancakes, I want to live! I mean, who in their right mind in a choice between pancakes and living chooses pancakes? - Harold Crick
Little did he know. That means there's something he doesn't know, which means there's something you don't know, did you know that? - Dr. Hilbert
although its not really a comedy, Will Ferrell's character is fun to watch and to a certain extent funny but he doesnt ruin the seriousness that the movie is supposed to have. i mean, all he has to do is be this plain guy with a plain life. but of course, his life became interesting when all of a sudden he hears the voice of a person narrating his life and realizes that he might be a character in a story. the thing is, i think the idea of this movie is very original because i havent seen anything like it. there might be similar ones or similar themes but not close enough to really think that this movie is like this movie or worse its a rip off of another movie.
the character Will Ferrell played reminded me of me, in a shallow sense of course. i dont hear a voice narrating my life but i also counted brush strokes but not the same number as his brush strokes. i wear my wrist watch on my right wrist and i also have an attachment to my wristwatch. and when i watched the movie, my wristwatch just stopped the day before. also, im pretty much a solitary type of guy (which is different from a loner. im both). thats it. its really shallow similarities.
also, the movie gave me a way of explaining my life (of course not in its entirety because im not harold crick/will ferrell's character). before i dont know how to put into words the explanation why i live my life. but somehow the movie was able to state it in a way thats a bit of an appropriate description. so here it is: my life is lived in a way that i refuse to let the plot continue because i might be in a tragedy and not a comedy. of course, the only way of finding out is by taking the next step. and thats just it, i dont want to take the next step until i get an idea where i am exactly. not that im worried of the ending. regardless of whether its a comedy or a tragedy, the ending isnt something to worry about. its how you get there, especially if its a tragedy. its what happens before the ending that worries me. so thats why i dont complain (not much) that im "stuck" in this part of my life because i intentionally refuse to let the plot unfold. or at least let the plot move slower than its supposed to be, to the point it might not be attuned to the rest of what its supposed to be connected with. the movie didnt cover this part of my life that could put into words the idea i have which is somehow related to my own understanding of karma.
Quotes from the movie:
This is a story about a man named Harold Crick and his wristwatch. Harold Crick was a man of infinite numbers, endless calculations, and remarkably few words. And his wristwatch said even less. Every weekday, for twelve years, Harold would brush each of his thirty-two teeth seventy-six times. Thirty-eight times back and forth, thirty-eight times up and down. Every weekday, for twelve years, Harold would tie his tie in a single Windsor knot instead of the double, thereby saving up to forty-three seconds. His wristwatch thought the single Windsor made his neck look fat, but said nothing. - Kay Eiffel as the Narrator
Anarchists have a group?...They assemble?...Wouldn't that completely defeat the purpose? - Ana Pascal
What is wrong with you? Hey, I don't want to eat nothing but pancakes, I want to live! I mean, who in their right mind in a choice between pancakes and living chooses pancakes? - Harold Crick
Little did he know. That means there's something he doesn't know, which means there's something you don't know, did you know that? - Dr. Hilbert
Monday, September 17, 2007
caffeine got my tongue
i dont know exactly when or how it started but i suddenly became a coffee addict. what i know is that it started with me buying coffee in the mall. on which coffee shop, i cant remember. since then, i got hooked. again.
years ago i also got addicted to coffee but that was instant coffee. i remember that i would always buy them coffee packets and use 2-3 at a time. so im not really drinking a cup of coffee, i was drinking a mug of coffee. although i buy cold ones in coffee shops, most of the time, it was instant coffee. the reason the addiction didnt last long was because the caffeine gave me headaches (i think its the caffeine because the decaf ones dont bother me). and once the effect of the coffee wears off, i get extremely drowsy. also, the reason i drank coffee was because i needed something to keep me awake or at least keep me alert.
now, im addicted not to instant coffee but to "coffee shop" coffee. i usually order cappuccino because thats whats usually available. and i only order hot coffee, unlike before where i order cold drinks whenever i buy something from coffee shops. and i dont like instant coffee anymore because the reason i drink coffee now is because of the taste and not because i need something to keep me alert. and having tasted different coffees from different coffee shops, ive realized how inferior instant coffees are when it comes to taste.
i think its been a month now since i got addicted to coffee. of course i did my research on the harmful effects of drinking too much coffee so i try not to abuse or drink too much of it. besides, im prone to hyperacidity. i still get headaches but not as bad as before. i only have very mild ones which are really very slight discomforts. the drowy effects is still there though. once the effect of the coffee wears off, i become extremely sleepy. and whenever i wake up in the morning, i still feel the extreme drowsiness. not sure if my body will adapt to that (no longer feel drowsy after a few hours when the caffeine wears off). i hope it will but i sort of doubt it. not sure if it can be changed by mere state of mind. and im not sure if im going to stop drinking coffee in the next few weeks.
also, ive learned how to drink hot coffee, like learning how to eat sisig. since both of them are served hot, chances are, if the person is not careful, he or she will burn his or her tongue. in the case of sisig, it took some time before i learned how to eat it. since im the type who eats quickly, i get annoyed when i have to wait before i can put the food in my mouth. so i was a bit pissed with eating sisig because its one of my favorite dishes and i cant eat it right away. so, the trick with it is not eating it on the sizzling plate or not having the rice on the sizzling plate (because some serve sisig with the rice in the sizzling plate, so you dont only get a sizzling hot sisig, you also get a sizzling hot rice which takes some time to cool down). its common sensical but it took a lot of burnt tongue before i realized that. so i frequented only those places that serve sisig with rice not placed in the sizzling plate. as for coffee, i had to wait for a few minutes to let it cool down before placing the cover. because i started with drinking it through the cover right after i add the sugar. and with the cover on, you dont get to see the coffee and the next thing you know, youve sipped enough coffee to burn your tongue. thats irritating because it doesnt only affect drinking the coffee but the subsequent meals for the next few days. so although common sensical, it took me a few 2-3 coffees before i realized that i shouldnt cover my coffee right away after adding the sugar. i should let it cool down a bit and once i get the right temperature so i wont scald my tongue, thats when i replace the cover and thats when i start drinking it.
sometimes i give too much thought on things people dont even find significant. like the daily commute for example. commuting is a science as sitting is an art.
years ago i also got addicted to coffee but that was instant coffee. i remember that i would always buy them coffee packets and use 2-3 at a time. so im not really drinking a cup of coffee, i was drinking a mug of coffee. although i buy cold ones in coffee shops, most of the time, it was instant coffee. the reason the addiction didnt last long was because the caffeine gave me headaches (i think its the caffeine because the decaf ones dont bother me). and once the effect of the coffee wears off, i get extremely drowsy. also, the reason i drank coffee was because i needed something to keep me awake or at least keep me alert.
now, im addicted not to instant coffee but to "coffee shop" coffee. i usually order cappuccino because thats whats usually available. and i only order hot coffee, unlike before where i order cold drinks whenever i buy something from coffee shops. and i dont like instant coffee anymore because the reason i drink coffee now is because of the taste and not because i need something to keep me alert. and having tasted different coffees from different coffee shops, ive realized how inferior instant coffees are when it comes to taste.
i think its been a month now since i got addicted to coffee. of course i did my research on the harmful effects of drinking too much coffee so i try not to abuse or drink too much of it. besides, im prone to hyperacidity. i still get headaches but not as bad as before. i only have very mild ones which are really very slight discomforts. the drowy effects is still there though. once the effect of the coffee wears off, i become extremely sleepy. and whenever i wake up in the morning, i still feel the extreme drowsiness. not sure if my body will adapt to that (no longer feel drowsy after a few hours when the caffeine wears off). i hope it will but i sort of doubt it. not sure if it can be changed by mere state of mind. and im not sure if im going to stop drinking coffee in the next few weeks.
also, ive learned how to drink hot coffee, like learning how to eat sisig. since both of them are served hot, chances are, if the person is not careful, he or she will burn his or her tongue. in the case of sisig, it took some time before i learned how to eat it. since im the type who eats quickly, i get annoyed when i have to wait before i can put the food in my mouth. so i was a bit pissed with eating sisig because its one of my favorite dishes and i cant eat it right away. so, the trick with it is not eating it on the sizzling plate or not having the rice on the sizzling plate (because some serve sisig with the rice in the sizzling plate, so you dont only get a sizzling hot sisig, you also get a sizzling hot rice which takes some time to cool down). its common sensical but it took a lot of burnt tongue before i realized that. so i frequented only those places that serve sisig with rice not placed in the sizzling plate. as for coffee, i had to wait for a few minutes to let it cool down before placing the cover. because i started with drinking it through the cover right after i add the sugar. and with the cover on, you dont get to see the coffee and the next thing you know, youve sipped enough coffee to burn your tongue. thats irritating because it doesnt only affect drinking the coffee but the subsequent meals for the next few days. so although common sensical, it took me a few 2-3 coffees before i realized that i shouldnt cover my coffee right away after adding the sugar. i should let it cool down a bit and once i get the right temperature so i wont scald my tongue, thats when i replace the cover and thats when i start drinking it.
sometimes i give too much thought on things people dont even find significant. like the daily commute for example. commuting is a science as sitting is an art.
Sunday, September 16, 2007
poor memory makes brilliant ideas go to waste.
i just hate it when the thought that im supposed to blog about just escapes me. ok. i dont think the phrase "escapes me" is that appropriate. and the statement doesnt seem to be that sound. anyway, i was already trying to sleep, since i went to bed early. then i just felt like i had to blog about this thought running in my head. so i got up, switched the PC on and when i was already connected to the internet, the thought was gone. by the time i was logged in my Blogger account, i couldnt even find a trace of that thought. i hate it when that happens. and it happens a lot. if only i could write the thoughts in my head the moment im really in the mood to write it, i could have written a lot more blog entries than what i just blogged last month (and i could have written the real blog entries i wanted to write since what i write most of the time are merely brainless articles that are devoid of value and significance. well, not completely. it still serves as a record of my thoughts but they really arent ideas or significant thoughts that has more worth than just mere memory aids). im thinking of buying a notepad and a pen so i could write it down whenever and wherever a thought strikes in my head. but i dont think that will happen. ive been meaning to have my right knee checked but its been months and well, im still clueless if there's something wrong with it.
Friday, August 24, 2007
finally! here's some cake
ive been trying to upload this video i made when i was...well, procrastinating. ive been trying to upload it for a week! the file size was too big so i had to convert it into different video formats. the smallest file size i had was in flash video format but unfortunately, video hosting sites do not support such format. and uploading it with the usual mpeg format was always unsuccessful probably because of the file size and my intermittent connection. well, big thanks to vimeo.com, which is really good in uploading videos with big file sizes, i was finally able to upload this video (i think i used a divx video format). well, its a song by cake (short skirt, long jacket) and then i added a bunch of desktop wallpapers. i was planning to upload the song on multiply when i thought, its a bit boring without watching anything. although its a nice song to listen to, i would like to see something or watch something with it. so i thought of adding some wallpapers. so there.
cake1 from anubz and Vimeo.
cake1 from anubz and Vimeo.
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
edit
i think i better edit my blog entries before i post them. just read the preceding entry and there are grammatical errors. sometime the thought changes in mid sentence and i dont read the sentence again in its entirety. so i end up with awkward sentences. ill edit someday. not tonight. i need to sleep and i have to force myself to be busy for the next few days to make-up for the lost time caused by the suspension of classes.
death
why are people scared of death? its a once in a lifetime experience and its probably the best thing that could happen to a person. i mean, we start dying the moment we are born. its just a question of when death will come for us. its never really a question of where or how. its always when. but people dont want to ask when. its always how or where or worst, why. why would you ask why? why would i want to think of death? why do i have to die? why are people scared of death? i just asked that. so why? is it because of the fear of not being part of the world of the living? is it because you're going to be detached from your loved ones? is it because you will cease to exist? is it because there might be nothing on the other side? is it merely fear of the unknown? my answer to that is, so what? whats so great about this world that people want to live long lives? we have global warming, crime, pollution and a million other stuff thats not really good to live with. why is life worth living? because of one's family, friends, and other loved ones? why do people hold on so much for their dear lives? because there's so much to experience in this world? the fear of the death might be caused of the pain it brings to the people left behind by the deceased. but if thats the root of the fear, then death is only painful to the living and not the dead. so the person thats going to die shouldnt be scared of it. but thats being insensitive to the people he or she will leave behind. and that couldnt be the only explanation for the fear that people have of death. but that might explain why some people can face death easily. the dying arent really the ones who's going to feel the full impact of death. its the living. if death truly means ceasing to exist, then the previous statement is true. why? the person's dead. how can he feel death? some people might fear death just because it detaches them from the world of the living. they think there's so many things they would like to do and people they would like to be with. death is an obstacle to those things and people. so they dont want death to come knocking yet. but most people dont realize these in their daily lives until death makes it presence felt in their minds. usually, death does this through doctors who can be seen as messengers of death. as messengers, they make approximations how far you are from death. if youre healthy, then youre as far as possible from death given that no accidents or other unusual circumstances happen. if youre sick, it depends on the illness. point is, death may pass the message to doctors to tell people that time is running out. people may fear and ignore death all they want but they cant deny the fact that death will come eventually. sometimes its a good thing to hear death through doctors. at least you get a head up. you prepare for the inevitable. accidents are just tragic and violent. anyway, as i was asking, whats with all this fear of death business? i think the current social norm is to keep death at bay as long as possible. ok, nothing wrong with that as long as we dont fear death.sometimes fearing something causes misconceptions and well, disrespect. i think its disrespectful to fear death. i mean, why dont we fear time? isnt time and death intertwined? like i said, its really a question of when. so its like death and time are good buddies only that time is a much bigger than death. its like death merely rides along time. death is dependent on time but not vice versa. time can exist without death. but death needs time to fulfill its purpose. so, why dont we fear time when time brings along death with it? is it because of the nature of death? its not time that ends life, its death. so we respect time but fear death just because it takes away thats merely given to us. be it religion or science, both fields agree that life is merely temporary. so why are people deeply bothered by the thought of death and they feel immensely bad or fear if death is near? theres a lot of factors of course but theres got to be a very good and convincing answer for this question. what is it? i dont know. it just so happens that i was reminded of this question a while ago. and i really think that death or knowing death, acknowledging it, respecting it, is much better than trying to push it away, keeping it at bay and being afraid of it.
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
i just hate this month
i hate august. just got called for nego again and wasnt able to answer. how nice. i wouldnt mind if i didnt study. problem was i did. crap. at least i was able to say something as opposed to the last time where my mind just went absolutely blank. the only thing flashing in my mind during that recitation was Cebu. but thats only the name of the case. how the crap can the word Cebu help me in my recitation. as for a while ago, i really couldnt recall the details of the case. all i had was a general idea, very general idea, of the case. that wont even lead me anywhere. and to make things worse, i cant understand where my recitation was heading. fucking crap. maybe its my blood illness acting up. its affecting my memory retention and retrieval. its slowing down my brain functions. ok, blame the illness. when i took the LAE interview a few years ago, i had a high fever. but did use it as an excuse? no. i still went to that interview even if i wasnt feeling well. i couldnt even stand the air-conditioning so i stayed outside the room while i was waiting for my turn. got waitlisted for that. i was stuttering during the interview and i had a hard time thinking. but that didnt stop me and i didnt blame my fever for getting waitlisted. so i wont blame the sucky recitation on my blood illness. besides, its only a probability. so am i blaming it on august instead? not really. but i am thinking that its not surprising that my recitations suck this month. august is the month that always gives me a hard time. not that my recitations are good but my recent recitations are the worst for this semester. and im kind of hoping that by the time august ends, i get to recite without my mind going blank or taking years for me to retrieve the answer in my head. and its not a self-fulfilling prophecy either. i dont think im going to have a sucky recit because its august. i just remind myself that its august after the stupid recitation. so its more of an afterthought really. and i dont condition my mind that just because its august mean im going to get sucky recits. i just tell myself that i should try harder and if that doesnt work, its august after all. so i do try to change things but well, sometimes, no matter how much i try, there are things that just wont change...yet.
Monday, August 20, 2007
Transformers in IMAX theaters!
The Transformers movie will be shown in IMAX theaters on September 21 with additional footage! Now, im not sure if it meant IMAX theaters worldwide or IMAX theaters including the one in SM Mall of Asia (the second IMAX theater is said to be being built on SM North Edsa, on what used to be SM North Annex Building, and is scheduled to be finished by 2008) but if it includes our local IMAX theater then im still going to see it (i hope i get to see it. i mean, there's such a thing as force majeure). Watching the Transformers movie on TV isn't the same as watching it in theaters (for me anyway). It might not be in 3D (since it never mentioned IMAX 3D. i used to think when a movie is shown in IMAX theaters, it meant the movie is in 3D. i was wrong) but at least it has additional footage. I was planning to watch the Transformers movie for one last time before they stopped showing it in cinemas but an old guy scared me before i even bought the ticket.
As for the Voltron movie, some might think its corny to make a movie out of it. It would probably look like a Power Rangers movie. Like Transformers, it may also be a robot movie but its a robot that...umm..well, "volts in". I mean, which is cooler, "transforming" robots or robots that "volt in"? Some said a Transformers movie was idiotic but they're not complaining now after they saw the movie. I get the point that the Voltron movie might turn out to be a lame idea but i just hope that it wont turn out to be something more of a Power Rangers movie with better special effects. It probably wont suck as some people think (i hope). i mean, i did love watching Bioman and Maskman when i was a kid. but that doesnt mean im going to like a Voltron movie made that way unless i wanted to see a comedy or a spoof of robot cartoons/tv series.i guess it depends on whether they can make the necessary changes (like the changes they made in the Transformers movie) or making a well-made film adaptation to make the Voltron movie really look good. wait, isnt that the point of everything, in making this movie? Anyway, there are also plans to make a Thundercats movie (not sure if this was given a go signal already, read this news a month ago, i think). I think this one wont be a live-action version but more of a CGI movie like the TMNT movie.
More info on Transformers in IMAX:
joblo.com
comingsoon.net
IMAX on SM North
As for the Voltron movie, some might think its corny to make a movie out of it. It would probably look like a Power Rangers movie. Like Transformers, it may also be a robot movie but its a robot that...umm..well, "volts in". I mean, which is cooler, "transforming" robots or robots that "volt in"? Some said a Transformers movie was idiotic but they're not complaining now after they saw the movie. I get the point that the Voltron movie might turn out to be a lame idea but i just hope that it wont turn out to be something more of a Power Rangers movie with better special effects. It probably wont suck as some people think (i hope). i mean, i did love watching Bioman and Maskman when i was a kid. but that doesnt mean im going to like a Voltron movie made that way unless i wanted to see a comedy or a spoof of robot cartoons/tv series.i guess it depends on whether they can make the necessary changes (like the changes they made in the Transformers movie) or making a well-made film adaptation to make the Voltron movie really look good. wait, isnt that the point of everything, in making this movie? Anyway, there are also plans to make a Thundercats movie (not sure if this was given a go signal already, read this news a month ago, i think). I think this one wont be a live-action version but more of a CGI movie like the TMNT movie.
More info on Transformers in IMAX:
joblo.com
comingsoon.net
IMAX on SM North
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
suspension of classes
i dont know if its weird but lately, im not really happy when classes are suspended. like now, classes were suspended and i really didnt feel relieved or glad to hear the news. and theres also an announcement that classes are suspended again tomorrow. i see it more of as a bad news than good news. im hoping that were not covered by the suspension, but thats highly unlikely. i cant exactly say why i dont like these suspensions. one reason i can think of is the make-up classes we have to schedule in lieu of the missed classes. thats just it, the classes are merely suspended. it does not mean we wont have the same number of classes, it merely moves it to another date. so, in effect, it just disrupts the normal schedule. of course, a suspension of classes here and there would be nice because it can serve as a much needed break from the daily law classes. but i just dont like these "erratic" suspensions. besides, there are two holidays coming up. so there's a lot of "free" days to take a break. these suspensions are not whimsical of course. im being inconsiderate and very narrow-minded if i see these suspesions that way. there are legitimate reasons behind these suspensions and there are people that are badly in need of such because they are negatively affected by the weather. its just, im not really happy that classes are suspended. another reason is that, maybe i just dont like staying at home. i just need to be somewhere else, even getting stuck in the law library. i hope the law library is open tomorrow. i would go there no matter how strong the rains are. not that im being nerdy (although thats my aim this semester. one of our professor's got a point. if we dont develop good study habits now, there's no point continuing our law studies because its just bound to get harder. and i havent really exerted as much effort as other law students do), its just im more productive outside our house. its more enjoyable to be anywhere than our place. maybe im growing tired of our home.
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