one notable thing i noticed now that im practicing law is my lack of confidence and uncertainty with what i know. i think i still sound like a stuttering law student when i explain the law or give legal advice. i just keep doubting myself.
its different when im asked about other topics. ask me about science stuff i know or tech stuff, i would discuss it with authority and sound like im taking the person to school (i think no one uses this phrase anymore. i probably havent heard it for more than half a decade). i become really persuasive and im good with bluffing when its about a topic im "comfortable" with. that's why my siblings always doubt me when i start to discuss something with enthusiasm. because sometimes i get carried away and i mix my opinion with the facts and make it appear as truths. i present myself as a know-it-all and really deliver what i know (or what i think i know) very convincingly. if only i can sell the stuff i know, i wouldnt be having any financial problems. the thing is, i need to really believe in what i know. its a basic thing in order to be confident about it.
i dont know why, despite after months of law practice, i still doubt myself. maybe because im too worried, that what i say will affect lives. i cant be careless in law practice. fatal mistakes can be committed (a person can rot in jail or a poor client can lose his or her life's savings), as opposed to being asked on topics that will not cause any irreparable or serious injury. im too mindful of the consequences that it makes me less effective.
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