i think i need to get a second job

i said something to myself earlier this morning that made me ask myself again whether i heard myself right. i do surprise myself from time to time. i asked myself why i think i need a tablet computer because im really trying to manage my expenses (this is my deliberative process where i try to convince myself whether an expensive item is worth buying. i ask myself from time to time questions and see if my answer will be consistent and persuasive, given that im the type who loses interest on things after some time. losing interest is equal to treating it as if it doesn't exist). lately, ive spent more than what was scheduled due to some unexpected expenses. so i answered myself saying that i need a tablet computer so i can work wherever i go, even when im on vacation.

huh? seriously? i want to work while taking a vacation? actually there's no surprise there but my initial thought for wanting a tablet computer is for easy access to files while im on the move, for efficiency. using a laptop just to check a portion written in a MS word file or just to check an email isnt efficient. and its not that accessible especially when i receive a call to check something in my computer while im lining up in a fastfood restaurant. so i thought a tablet computer would be nice. i could use it as an e-reader too (thats why i dropped kindle off my list) and i can check my codal provisions with ease. or make some minor editing on my pleadings when an idea suddenly comes to mind. i didnt consider wanting it so i can work while on vacation (although, admittedly, it will have that purpose but still, its not one of the favorable arguments i considered before). and i doubt i will be taking a vacation this year or probably next year (maybe by the end of next year would be the earliest).

so i asked myself another question, am i really a workaholic? maybe in a way i am. sure im not the type who gives his best in doing his work but somehow, my work is my life. its something that occupies me and its something worth doing. i dont like abandoning unfinished work and i try to be as responsible as i can be but i dont really love my work as much as it appears. not because i dont like it but i just dont love anything (unless one would want to construe my being an infatuation junkie as an exhibition of love, which i doubt can be considered as equal to one another). or maybe working is something that somehow minimizes the boredom thats why i appear to be always working.

anyway, the weekend has arrived. i will get some well needed rest. i bought the groceries today right after work so i wont have much to do this weekend. the only thing i have left for tomorrow is pay some bills. then if im in the mood, might do some work. i sound like a workaholic but i think im not. this work could have been finished weeks ago but since there's no deadline yet, ive been doing it on a piecemeal basis. so im not procrastinating and im not really working hard either. i just try to do my work with the least amount of stress.