last week, i was with my brother and my cousin at my cousin's friend's house. there my cousin commented that all three of us (me and my siblings) have "fine arts" running in our blood. but it was only me who didnt pursue it and took up law instead. she said this allowed both my siblings to pursue their fine arts related careers (my cousin's friend is a fine arts graduate/painter. i think. i just woke up then and was asked to tag along). it gave her the impression i took up my law studies against my will.
well, not really. i gave up on drawing as early as high school. i abandoned it completely the moment i decided not to continue my UP College of Fine Arts application. i decided to take up law when i was in 3rd year college. not because i thought lawyering was awesome but because i was interested in the field. its hard for us to like lawyering because we grew up being taught lawyering is about defending people and getting paid in kind (like eggs, live poultry, seafood, etc), not in cash (so if lawyering is as simple as that, it looks boring and not very rewarding). and if there is cash payment, i thought its not much because my lawyer relatives arent rich. if theyre rich, theyre not solely working as lawyers. they have businesses too. point is, we werent told that lawyering could be a lucrative profession. i only learned about it when i was in law school already. i see lawyers portrayed in movies and television but what i notice are their courtroom battles and not their wealth. the suits dont mean anything except being well dressed.
when i was already in law school, i rarely had doubts whether i wanted to be a laywer. when i decided to take up law back in college, i was determined to finish it. i may not have finished on time, but i did finish it. and in the years i was in law school, what confirmed that i wanted to be a lawyer was when i was in OLA. what i did in OLA confirmed what i wanted to do. lawyering is something i wanted to do and i find it enjoyable. so taking up law and finishing it is not against my will. i think i give off this impression probably because i want to do a lot of things and at the same time, im not passionate with my law studies. i guess im simply a person thats not very passionate with most things. this particular cousin have seen how happy i can be (something that rarely happens and only less than a handful of people have witnessed. seriously, less than a handful) and she never saw me to be like that with regard to my law studies. so its understandable to get that impression.
now, im working in a law office as a legal researcher, with a salary a little higher than the minimum wage. i keep telling other people that im still looking for other law offices to transfer to because i need to save some money. but im not really exerting much effort. im starting to think i really dont want to leave my current office. i may not be earning much but im getting good exposure with the variety of cases being handled. its a good place to learn. its a good place to practice. the only downside is the pay is not good. i think the reason im not eager to look for other law offices is because i still think lawyering isnt about making money (i should never think its about making money). this is my childhood concept of lawyering and im sort of living it. well, sort of and not completely since im not a lawyer yet but this is how ive always thought how lawyering is. to be asked to defend people without much monetary rewards. its not that im not into money making or something to that effect. its just that ive always thought that if im going to make money, its not through lawyering. thats why im trying to look for other ways to earn.
anyway, not sure if i can stay long in this current office since what this law office needs is a lawyer and not much of a legal researcher. and i cant work for free because i need to earn too.
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