today, i bought a starbucks coffee with much unwillingness. normally, i would buy a regular brewed coffee from Mcdonalds Matalino but for some undisclosed reason (undisclosed to me), the said Mcdonalds branch is closed indefinitely. my next alternative would be Burger King's BK Joe. But given the rainy weather, i dont feel like travelling some considerable distance because the cold weather is aggravating my lower back pain. its been days now since this lower back pain started. anyway, i need some coffee because despite the long weekend, i have lots of work to do. since im going to be working at home, coffee is a must because whenever i work inside my room, the usual scenario is i end up sleeping instead. this is why i always work at Burger King or some other noisy fast food restaurant where i can plug my laptop with its useless battery (almost useless. it has enough juice to enable me to shut off the laptop properly whenever there is a blackout). i can still work despite the noise because i think there's something wrong with my ears. when im in an open space, i noticed that the sound volume is the same regardless of distance. so a person talking from far away has the same volume as a person talking near me. that's why i easily get disoriented when a lot of people are talking at the same time in a big room because the sound coming from all the talking people appear to be of the same volume. sometimes i cant even determine which one is talking because the voice of the farther person has the same sound level as the person talking near me. i guess this is also the reason i easily get distracted in public places because i always pick up the sound coming from my surrounding area.
going back, i dont have anything against starbucks. i just dont really want to buy expensive coffee. and starbucks always reminds me of my freshman college mentality (my marxist phase). due to this, i always try not to go to starbucks as much as i can. it makes me feel really uncomfortable (so uncomfortable that i want to get out of the place quickly after i get my order. but i pretend im not in a hurry to leave). but then again, after i got my coffee, i felt like a hypocrite. saying to myself that i used to despise a place that primarily caters to well-off people (or people who can afford to buy a cup of coffee that can feed a family of three, maybe even more) when i have with me an Ateneo umbrella and listening to my mp3 player with a pair of Sennheiser earphones (an expensive school and an expensive brand). and i was seriously considering buying one of their expensive thermal mugs (again, an expensive product). it made me think that maybe deep inside i like starbucks because it wouldnt be the first time that im very critical of something i really like.
anyway, the rainy weather is nice and there's a long weekend too but i cant enjoy it as much because of the work i must do.
Sunday, June 19, 2011
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
it tastes bad so it must be good for one's health
for a person who doesnt mind dying or wont prevent death from visiting me, i sure have a weird way of showing it. i think its been a month since i started my veggie lunch diet. i only eat veggies and rice for lunch. and before this veggie lunch thingie, i already started adding healthy food to my diet (i regularly consume sweet potatoes, sweetened soy bean curd, milk, fruits, etc. if im eating in a fast food restaurant and they have a salad, i add the salad to my order just to have some veggies im my meal). i also try to minimize the meat i eat (but i still eat mcdonald's quarter pounder meal every week. i really cant quit it). now, i dont want to grow old because i dont want to live a long life but with what im doing, im actually extending on what could be a short existence on this planet.
this healthy food thing im doing began when i started feeling some physical pain (and the reason for the "only veggies for lunch" thingie was due to my stomach getting upset whenever i consume a certain type of meat. it started with an experiment whether it was the meat and based from my experiment, it was the meat and my stomach really didnt like it). due to the discomfort, i decided to become a bit health conscious. now, the healthy food diet did help. its like discovering the obvious. i guess this is the 2nd obvious thing ive confirmed. the other one was the joke i shared with a friend where one can get good grades through studying. we confirmed it was true when we were about to finish law school. anyway, healthy food is indeed good for you. but it seems thats not enough. right now, my f*ckin lower back hurts. its been hurting all day and i dont know why. my brain is suggesting exercise. really? isnt regularly consuming healthy food enough? im adding years to my life already, i dont want to extend it to a decade. crap. if i give in to the suggestion of my brain, im changing the course of my life and my cause of death. that is, if my brain can successfully convince me to exercise. right now, my idea for solving my back problem is to buy a comfy chair. its expensive but much more convenient than exercise. the only way im going to actually exercise regularly is if a young or middle-aged woman who can be aptly described as an athletic hottie gives me a very good reason to do it. not even a doctor can convince me to exercise even if my life depended on it. unless the doctor is some incredibly attractive female doctor...then....i would still say no but i might be open to some convincing if she has enough valid reasons. point is...i dont want to exercise. the physical discomfort brought by growing old is really annoying.
this healthy food thing im doing began when i started feeling some physical pain (and the reason for the "only veggies for lunch" thingie was due to my stomach getting upset whenever i consume a certain type of meat. it started with an experiment whether it was the meat and based from my experiment, it was the meat and my stomach really didnt like it). due to the discomfort, i decided to become a bit health conscious. now, the healthy food diet did help. its like discovering the obvious. i guess this is the 2nd obvious thing ive confirmed. the other one was the joke i shared with a friend where one can get good grades through studying. we confirmed it was true when we were about to finish law school. anyway, healthy food is indeed good for you. but it seems thats not enough. right now, my f*ckin lower back hurts. its been hurting all day and i dont know why. my brain is suggesting exercise. really? isnt regularly consuming healthy food enough? im adding years to my life already, i dont want to extend it to a decade. crap. if i give in to the suggestion of my brain, im changing the course of my life and my cause of death. that is, if my brain can successfully convince me to exercise. right now, my idea for solving my back problem is to buy a comfy chair. its expensive but much more convenient than exercise. the only way im going to actually exercise regularly is if a young or middle-aged woman who can be aptly described as an athletic hottie gives me a very good reason to do it. not even a doctor can convince me to exercise even if my life depended on it. unless the doctor is some incredibly attractive female doctor...then....i would still say no but i might be open to some convincing if she has enough valid reasons. point is...i dont want to exercise. the physical discomfort brought by growing old is really annoying.
i guess this is too much to ask...for now.
i wish there's a virtual copy of Philippine malls. take for example the mall in North EDSA. i wish there is an online version of it where i can browse its stores with the use of my computer. i can roam inside it, navigate each and every store and check their products with the use of an internet browser and a computer mouse. not that im too lazy to go to the mall. its just im too busy to use up my time walking around inside the mall only to end up finding out that the product im looking for is not available or they dont have anything i like. calling the store itself is a convenient alternative but im more of a visual person and i prefer to see things rather than hear about it. and i can only use such option if i know what im looking for. it wont apply if i just want to window shop first. so i want a technology where i can window shop in a particular mall online and i want that technology applied in this country or at least in Metro Manila. aside from virtual window shopping, it could help save time because when i actually go to the mall, i already know where to go and i already know what to buy. the only problem that i will have to deal with is the travel time that i will consume by actually going to the mall.
a much simpler alternative is for the stores and stalls inside the mall to put up websites where they will post and update their list of items available. but i still prefer having a virtual mall instead of just a website.
im the type of buyer that can be very picky or very impulsive. sometimes i know what i want to buy but im too specific about it so even if there's a wide range of choices, i end up not buying anything because none of the products are good enough. sometimes i dont even have a plan to buy anything but when i see something that for some strange reason i must buy it at that very moment (even if not necessary) and i know i can afford it, i just buy it. i just happen to be in the mood to buy it. in both instances, i need to roam around the mall. and roaming consumes time. and time is something i dont have. well, i do have time now. but mall hours prevent me from using my free time to roam inside the mall and browse for items i need or want to buy.
i sound like a shopaholic but im not. i just miss roaming inside the mall. it used to be some sort of stress reliever. im a mallrat since highschool. i like dropping by the mall and do some window shopping. now, i cant do that anymore. well, not as frequent as before. i just dont have the time.
a much simpler alternative is for the stores and stalls inside the mall to put up websites where they will post and update their list of items available. but i still prefer having a virtual mall instead of just a website.
im the type of buyer that can be very picky or very impulsive. sometimes i know what i want to buy but im too specific about it so even if there's a wide range of choices, i end up not buying anything because none of the products are good enough. sometimes i dont even have a plan to buy anything but when i see something that for some strange reason i must buy it at that very moment (even if not necessary) and i know i can afford it, i just buy it. i just happen to be in the mood to buy it. in both instances, i need to roam around the mall. and roaming consumes time. and time is something i dont have. well, i do have time now. but mall hours prevent me from using my free time to roam inside the mall and browse for items i need or want to buy.
i sound like a shopaholic but im not. i just miss roaming inside the mall. it used to be some sort of stress reliever. im a mallrat since highschool. i like dropping by the mall and do some window shopping. now, i cant do that anymore. well, not as frequent as before. i just dont have the time.
Saturday, June 11, 2011
life really doesnt want me to easily get by
just when i thought things cant get any worse for the case im handling...
i inherited a case from a lawyer (not connected with our law office) who for health reasons cannot continue handling the case. since our law office lacks enough lawyers (there's only two of us), the case was assigned to me. now this is a case that requires some expertise in a particular field of law and some form of specialization since its not the same as regular court proceedings. and since i merely inherited it, im bound by the initial actions of the previous handling lawyer, so my theories are already limited as well as my pieces of evidence. actually, i have to adopt the theory and pieces of evidence and figure out how to make use of it.
last week, i had to change my theory and strategy because of some facts that i uncovered. not that they were contrary to what ive been told but it somehow affects the flow of the case theory because the facts were material enough that it cant be ignored. now this weekend, ive been informed that my key witness wont be available as scheduled because she had to undergo an emergency operation. of course i understand its no one's fault and i will pray for the success of her operation and speedy recovery. its just that, why does it have to happen now? time is of the essence. she's my last witness and scheduled to testify on monday. so life, i ask you...seriously? a friend would comment that the reason this is happening is because im the one handling it. life just loves giving me challenges. here is a case that requires specialization and expertise and not normally assigned to someone who just passed the bar exams. and now i have to deal with the unavailability of a key witness? i mean, i could dispense with any of my witnesses except this one. why does it have to be her? and why now? just a few days away from her scheduled trial date. actually, she was supposed to be presented earlier but due to circumstances that arose during the course of the trial, i had to move her schedule and be the last one to be presented. its like life really likes meddling with my plans and maneuvered things to make it not as simple as it should be.
i inherited a case from a lawyer (not connected with our law office) who for health reasons cannot continue handling the case. since our law office lacks enough lawyers (there's only two of us), the case was assigned to me. now this is a case that requires some expertise in a particular field of law and some form of specialization since its not the same as regular court proceedings. and since i merely inherited it, im bound by the initial actions of the previous handling lawyer, so my theories are already limited as well as my pieces of evidence. actually, i have to adopt the theory and pieces of evidence and figure out how to make use of it.
last week, i had to change my theory and strategy because of some facts that i uncovered. not that they were contrary to what ive been told but it somehow affects the flow of the case theory because the facts were material enough that it cant be ignored. now this weekend, ive been informed that my key witness wont be available as scheduled because she had to undergo an emergency operation. of course i understand its no one's fault and i will pray for the success of her operation and speedy recovery. its just that, why does it have to happen now? time is of the essence. she's my last witness and scheduled to testify on monday. so life, i ask you...seriously? a friend would comment that the reason this is happening is because im the one handling it. life just loves giving me challenges. here is a case that requires specialization and expertise and not normally assigned to someone who just passed the bar exams. and now i have to deal with the unavailability of a key witness? i mean, i could dispense with any of my witnesses except this one. why does it have to be her? and why now? just a few days away from her scheduled trial date. actually, she was supposed to be presented earlier but due to circumstances that arose during the course of the trial, i had to move her schedule and be the last one to be presented. its like life really likes meddling with my plans and maneuvered things to make it not as simple as it should be.
Wednesday, June 08, 2011
i heard a rumour
just found out that there is a rumor that a female classmate visits me at my office and people think she's my girlfriend. problem is...no one has ever visited me at my office. absolutely no one. every single person that comes to me in my office are clients. no female classmate of mine knows exactly where my office is. actually, no female friend or acquaintance has ever visited me in my office. so i have no idea how that rumor came about. and im pretty sure that i would know if i have a female client that's almost the same age as me to be mistaken as a classmate. i have no such client. all my clients are way older than me. and im rarely seen with anyone inside the office. i just sit in my office room and work (or sleep). so again, i really cant see how rumors like that emerge (like the rumor four years ago while i was still in law school that i have a lawyer girlfriend).
the reason such rumors affect me is because i really would like to know the basis. if there is no basis, i would like to meet this girl they're talking about.
the reason such rumors affect me is because i really would like to know the basis. if there is no basis, i would like to meet this girl they're talking about.
Tuesday, June 07, 2011
still no improvement
if i were to look back at this point in time of my life, i would say...im being annoyingly laid back. while everyone else is making progress with their lives, im just trying to do things one day at a time with no worries (or i try not to worry). sure i have plans and ive thought about my future but right now, those plans just give an illusion im heading somewhere. im not really executing it. the plan is just there for me to follow but im not really using it as efficiently and effectively as i should. its like looking at a map without really reading it. i guess its a crammer's curse. i need time to start running out before i start to really move or act. and i need a couple of things going wrong before my brain starts to warm up and be useful. i guess im that type of creature that evolves abruptly due to extreme conditions. until that extreme condition manifest itself, i wont evolve into anything.
im not happy with the way im living right now. im starting to become impatient and annoyed with the way im handling things. its frustrating to know that i can do much more yet i dont do it simply because i dont see the need for it. i dont want to burden myself with stuff. as long as im accomplishing things, there's no reason to aim higher. i dont complicate my life unnecessarily. this sounds good actually because i avoid a stressful life but sometimes a stressful life is worth having to improve one's self. im at this age where i can accomplish a lot of things. im squandering opportunities by being laid back. i wont be able to do as much once i get older or if i start having some serious illness.
im tempted to start smoking again just to shake things a bit. there's just something about the way a stick of cigarette affects my mood and thought process. its like it clogs certain portions of my brain and allows something else to emerge. or its simply the nicotine. crap. if not for the pain it brings to my lungs, i wouldnt have quit. stupid lungs.
im not happy with the way im living right now. im starting to become impatient and annoyed with the way im handling things. its frustrating to know that i can do much more yet i dont do it simply because i dont see the need for it. i dont want to burden myself with stuff. as long as im accomplishing things, there's no reason to aim higher. i dont complicate my life unnecessarily. this sounds good actually because i avoid a stressful life but sometimes a stressful life is worth having to improve one's self. im at this age where i can accomplish a lot of things. im squandering opportunities by being laid back. i wont be able to do as much once i get older or if i start having some serious illness.
im tempted to start smoking again just to shake things a bit. there's just something about the way a stick of cigarette affects my mood and thought process. its like it clogs certain portions of my brain and allows something else to emerge. or its simply the nicotine. crap. if not for the pain it brings to my lungs, i wouldnt have quit. stupid lungs.
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
logged in for one last time...
probably. i just logged out of friendster a few minutes ago. havent logged in for a long time. if not for the site transformation, i probably wouldnt have logged in and backed-up the content i want to save. i didnt make use of its exporting tool. i have copies of those photos anyway. and im not much of a fan of my photos either. what i wanted to save were the testimonials and messages.
my friendster testimonials were...incomplete. i remember receiving testimonials from my fake accounts but it wasnt listed in my profile (ive got lots of fake accounts. i even had a "joint account"). well, i guess i wont be able to recover them anymore. what really bugged me were the messages. holy shit. ive completely forgotten about some of those messages and seeing just a glimpse of it...crap. i cant even...or i tried not to read some of those messages. it really bothered me. it bothered me because i really wanted to completely forget about it. and i have forgotten about it if not for the act of trying to save friendster messages. well, i still saved it anyway. i really cant delete such messages. well, i deleted it after making a back-up copy. its those kind of messages that are painful to remember and difficult to erase. and its worth saving because? i dont know. something that has a big impact could be worth something.
anyway, i still remember my first profile pic. it was an ID picture. i still remember my first friend on friendster. he was the one that convinced me to make a friendster account. it was 2003 and his "sales pitch" was, its a good networking site. its a good way of finding old friends. i was initially against the idea of making an account because i dont need a website to communicate with friends. there's real life interaction and there's email (and egroups). i didnt see the purpose of a social networking site. but finding old friends was a good use for it. so i made a friendster acccount. because i wanted to find someone from my past. and i did find them after a few years through friendster. and lost them for good after getting in touch with them. wow, that sucked. its only now that i realized that.
i think in the future, friendster would be one of those things i would find haunting, like those people who lived in the 80's seeing their 80's selves. cant believe i had a friendster account, had those crazy profile pics and exchanged messages with so and so.
my friendster testimonials were...incomplete. i remember receiving testimonials from my fake accounts but it wasnt listed in my profile (ive got lots of fake accounts. i even had a "joint account"). well, i guess i wont be able to recover them anymore. what really bugged me were the messages. holy shit. ive completely forgotten about some of those messages and seeing just a glimpse of it...crap. i cant even...or i tried not to read some of those messages. it really bothered me. it bothered me because i really wanted to completely forget about it. and i have forgotten about it if not for the act of trying to save friendster messages. well, i still saved it anyway. i really cant delete such messages. well, i deleted it after making a back-up copy. its those kind of messages that are painful to remember and difficult to erase. and its worth saving because? i dont know. something that has a big impact could be worth something.
anyway, i still remember my first profile pic. it was an ID picture. i still remember my first friend on friendster. he was the one that convinced me to make a friendster account. it was 2003 and his "sales pitch" was, its a good networking site. its a good way of finding old friends. i was initially against the idea of making an account because i dont need a website to communicate with friends. there's real life interaction and there's email (and egroups). i didnt see the purpose of a social networking site. but finding old friends was a good use for it. so i made a friendster acccount. because i wanted to find someone from my past. and i did find them after a few years through friendster. and lost them for good after getting in touch with them. wow, that sucked. its only now that i realized that.
i think in the future, friendster would be one of those things i would find haunting, like those people who lived in the 80's seeing their 80's selves. cant believe i had a friendster account, had those crazy profile pics and exchanged messages with so and so.
Monday, May 30, 2011
Monday, May 23, 2011
chucks and jeans
i was having my morning coffee at a nearby mcdonalds when i saw a law school batchmate/OLA teammate walk in. she approached me and asked where im off to. well, not really. i always misinterpret this question. its common to be asked "san ka ngayon?" which i think really means "what are you up to? or what's up with you?" instead of "where are you going today?". i always construe it as the latter. thats why i always get puzzled looks whenever i give my answer because they're wondering if im trying to be funny. obviously, they want updates about me rather than being informed where im heading for that particular day.
anyway, i answered correctly when i was asked the "please update me about yourself" question. i said im working in a nearby law office. she noted that i was only wearing a pair of jeans and chucks and a collared shirt (with a backpack). well, thats my office attire (and my office bag). i only wear court attire whenever i have court hearings (and i still use a backpack when i go to court). its not my thing to wear something formal or semi-formal (there are times i like wearing formal clothing but most of the time i dont). besides, our office doesnt have a dress code. i think the only rule is to just look decent enough. i guess. i think its common sense to look decent when one goes to the office. but since its not a strict rule, i sometimes go to the office with a 3 day to 5 day beard (i get lazy from time to time). clients dont seem to mind. i think. no one made a comment about my 3 day beard today (and im going to wear a 4day beard tomorrow. by wednesday, back to clean shaven look because im going to court). with my laid back clothing, no one would think im a lawyer. i think i dont even act like a lawyer. i still act like some average guy with an average job (lawyering is seen to be a not so average occupation in this country). i dont mind being seen this way. keeping a low profile has always been my thing. and i really like wearing comfy clothing regardless of how it looks (although my current clothes arent really comfy anymore).i gained a lot of weight lately resulting in 85% of my clothes not fitting me that nicely anymore in addition to the 10% that no longer fits me no matter how i try to wear it. my jeans feel tight already and some are already "falling apart" (one's got a hole and the zipper for another pair just broke earlier today). i only get new clothes during my birthday and during christmas. i dont buy my clothes. well, casual clothes to be more specific because i recently bought my court clothing. but given my current situation and probable continuous weight gain (i might be heading towards obesity. if i do reach that point, it will be the first time in my almost three decades of existence), i might have to buy clothes myself. its not my thing to buy clothes but i guess i really have no choice. its either i look stupid with uncomfy clothes or look stupid with comfy clothes that fit just right.
why did we make clothing this complicated in the first place? we just had to depart from simple clothing styles. well, i really dont mean what i just said because clothing and style have a big impact on appearance (i wont be able to appreciate the beauty of some celebrities if not for their sense of style). i just find buying my clothes really burdensome.
Sunday, May 22, 2011
improvement starts with "i". i also need a better eye and an aye attitude
earlier today, i had a crazy thought. i thought of stopping my lazy lifestyle and aiming for excellence for a change. thinking about it now makes me feel tired. i hate doing something burdensome. but lately, i have been thinking that im in a half decade slump. im not as good as i was before. im a retard now. i mean, my intellectual level has not made any substantial development for half a decade or maybe more (ive been complaining about this for quite some time and i havent done anything to address it). sure some people still think im some kind of intelligent person but for three or four years, i havent been able to meet those expectations (i got a low grade for the bar exams. i took the exam seriously but i didnt give my best. as usual. i dont like giving my 100%. but i really put a lot of effort in it. i really studied hard. so its a bit unfair, yet flattering, but still unfair, for people to say to me that i was too relaxed during the review. that all i did was rent and watch movies and go to kiddie parties. well, i did do such things but i still studied hard at the same time. i just have my way of doing things. sometimes i wish people would recognize my "hardwork" even if it appears to be not much work for them. for me its an effort already). i think the only reason they thought im some kind of intelligent person was through people who knew me before. so its just hearsay, devoid of any basis. as for others who have known me long enough, they still have faith that the old me is somewhere inside me, hibernating or something. they still believe i can do things simply because they believe i can still be as good as i was before.
anyway, i thought i cant afford to be lazy anymore. the longer i continue the lazy lifestyle, the dumber i get. i need to do some hardwork and aim higher (i hate hardwork when im the one doing it!). actually, its time to always aim for number one at everything. crap. i hate it but if i want to keep up with greatness, i have to. this new lawyer environment is no longer some "kid stuff" which i can easily deal with. i miss the days when greatness was some effortless thing. of course i can always choose not to be great or not be a man of greatness but i got this far already, might as well make the best of it. im not convinced with what i just said but i do feel bad if i dont make good use of this lawyering thing.
anyway, i thought i cant afford to be lazy anymore. the longer i continue the lazy lifestyle, the dumber i get. i need to do some hardwork and aim higher (i hate hardwork when im the one doing it!). actually, its time to always aim for number one at everything. crap. i hate it but if i want to keep up with greatness, i have to. this new lawyer environment is no longer some "kid stuff" which i can easily deal with. i miss the days when greatness was some effortless thing. of course i can always choose not to be great or not be a man of greatness but i got this far already, might as well make the best of it. im not convinced with what i just said but i do feel bad if i dont make good use of this lawyering thing.
Saturday, May 21, 2011
if the world is ending, im throwing a party. but i think most people would be too busy panicking.
so the world will end. so what? i dont know what the big fuss is all about. with the rapture prediction, the end of the world became a hot topic...for the nth time. and im joining the fray.
let Jesus return, let the world crumble, why worry about it? why are people so afraid of judgment day or end of the world or whatever that will end life as we know it?
contrary to popular belief, i am a God fearing person and i do practice my faith. despite Stephen Hawking's comment implying there is no God or divine being (i think that's his latest comment based on his recent assessment of life, the universe and everything) which i accept to be perfectly reasonable and rational, i still have faith in God. that's just the thing about faith, you just believe no matter what. but of course, i make sure i dont fall into blind adherence. that's making proper use of the God-given human will (unlike some Christians and other members of other religions). i pray every night, i go to mass every Sunday and i live my life trying to do things according to God's will. i make sure that im always guided by my conscience influenced by a spiritual self strengthened by faith in God. of course, being merely human, i am always susceptible to sin and temptation but thats part of practicing one' faith. its a never ending struggle to do more right than wrong, to live according to God's will (i now make a distinction between Church teachings and God's will. Church teachings are mostly valid except for some narrow-minded and inconsiderate positions which unavoidably raises doubts on the Church's authority on interpreting God's intentions). to strive to be perfect as part of the human thirst for the Infinite is supposed to be one of man's lifelong goals (if i remember my theology classes correctly).
anyway, if there's still time to repent, then repent. dont wait for the end of days to come. besides, at the end of the day during the end of the world, its God's call. as Stephen Hawking said "[w]e should seek the greatest value of our action". its weird that those who have a religion waste their time worrying about death and the end of the world instead of just living their lives in accordance to their faith. or is it just the Christians who worry? someone once said, "I like your Christ. I do not like your Christians. Your Christians are so unlike your Christ." (this quote is attributed to Gandhi but its still disputed whether he actually said it. so until there's a conclusive determination who said it, i will attribute it to someone). maybe thats why all this end of the world talk generate a lot of buzz.
Friday, May 20, 2011
just another PS3 entry
a friend asked me this few weeks ago: "what's up with guys and video games?"
i really dont know. we just like it. ever since i got tired of those facebook games, ive been craving for a PS3. now that i have a PS3, i dont even understand why i played those facebook games in the first place. well, i have to admit those facebook games arent that bad. but its certainly not comparable to "real" video games.
video games are enjoyable. pure and simple. we dont ask why, we just play. why guys like it more than girls, i have no idea. it never bothered me. although guys in a relationship might need some good explanation to give to their girlfriends why they spend a lot on video games (a newly released PS3 game costs around P2K. and there's no bootleg version for PS3 games on blu-ray discs). i guess thats why the PS3 added a lot of features. so guys can provide a good explanation why its worth the money. so aside from just being a simple video game console, it can play DVDs, Blu-ray movies and downloaded movies in .avi format (i dont know what other formats it can play. as long as it can play .avi format, im good). it can play downloaded Youtube videos in .mp4 format (because PS3's browser sucks so i dont bother using it to watch Youtube vids). if thats not enough, it has enough hard disk capacity to serve as a storage for photos and music library. i think it also has a simple built in video editor too (im not really that eager to find out the other features. i just want to play games and watch girls' generation videos. so instead of a music library, i have a music video library). its also a bluetooth and wifi enabled device. but like i said, its internet browser sucks.
so for a video game console with a lot of features, its not a bad purchase. well, its not a problem for an employed single guy like me. i dont need to convince anyone. its my money, its my time. but with regard to my friend, she still didnt get it. she knows it has a lot of features but still, its a video game console, primarily used for video games. money can be spent on more valuable things instead on a blu-ray disc worth around P2K to be used on a machine thats worth thousands (depends on the PS3 model. the ones that are still in production are at least P13K with the latest model around P14K. that is, if one can find decent enough stores that sell it at this low price. most stores usually sell it at P18K-P21K. thats why it took me weeks of canvassing).
i wasnt able to explain to her why guys like video games, why guys are willing to spend a lot on these things even if we dont have much time to use it (if i were in college, i would be playing video games all day. but since im working now, i try to squeeze in some game time whenever i can). its not necessarily a guy thing but it looks that way. we really just like to play video games.
i really dont know. we just like it. ever since i got tired of those facebook games, ive been craving for a PS3. now that i have a PS3, i dont even understand why i played those facebook games in the first place. well, i have to admit those facebook games arent that bad. but its certainly not comparable to "real" video games.
video games are enjoyable. pure and simple. we dont ask why, we just play. why guys like it more than girls, i have no idea. it never bothered me. although guys in a relationship might need some good explanation to give to their girlfriends why they spend a lot on video games (a newly released PS3 game costs around P2K. and there's no bootleg version for PS3 games on blu-ray discs). i guess thats why the PS3 added a lot of features. so guys can provide a good explanation why its worth the money. so aside from just being a simple video game console, it can play DVDs, Blu-ray movies and downloaded movies in .avi format (i dont know what other formats it can play. as long as it can play .avi format, im good). it can play downloaded Youtube videos in .mp4 format (because PS3's browser sucks so i dont bother using it to watch Youtube vids). if thats not enough, it has enough hard disk capacity to serve as a storage for photos and music library. i think it also has a simple built in video editor too (im not really that eager to find out the other features. i just want to play games and watch girls' generation videos. so instead of a music library, i have a music video library). its also a bluetooth and wifi enabled device. but like i said, its internet browser sucks.
so for a video game console with a lot of features, its not a bad purchase. well, its not a problem for an employed single guy like me. i dont need to convince anyone. its my money, its my time. but with regard to my friend, she still didnt get it. she knows it has a lot of features but still, its a video game console, primarily used for video games. money can be spent on more valuable things instead on a blu-ray disc worth around P2K to be used on a machine thats worth thousands (depends on the PS3 model. the ones that are still in production are at least P13K with the latest model around P14K. that is, if one can find decent enough stores that sell it at this low price. most stores usually sell it at P18K-P21K. thats why it took me weeks of canvassing).
i wasnt able to explain to her why guys like video games, why guys are willing to spend a lot on these things even if we dont have much time to use it (if i were in college, i would be playing video games all day. but since im working now, i try to squeeze in some game time whenever i can). its not necessarily a guy thing but it looks that way. we really just like to play video games.
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Pureisutēshon Surī
finally got me self a sony playstation 3! its been years since i played a video game through a video game console. my very first video game console (which i didnt really own since i did not buy it with my own money) was a PS one. i got it when i was already a freshman in college. i started losing interest in it when the PS2 was released and my cousin bought one. playing games with the PS one doesnt feel as exciting after experiencing PS2.
and now, i have my own PS3. one my major purchases since i became a laywer (the first one was a lenovo laptop which was not for me). im old but not too old for video games. you cant be too old for video games. well, in a few years, my generation will find out if there's such a thing as being too old for video games. video games have changed ever since the 1970s (when the first generation of video game consoles were born).
anyway, i bought it on a friday night, almost three weeks ago. i came home itching to buy it. i was planning on buying one ever since i passed the bar (as a reward for myself) but i cant decide when. almost everyday i kept telling my siblings im going to buy myself a PS3. i cant just buy it because there are a lot of other important things i should be spending my money on (although i do have enough money to buy one, still, i need to prioritize the necessary expenses). also, i have work so when i do buy one, i must have time to play it so i can test it well. but on that particular friday night, i just cant bear it any longer. i just had to buy it. so i did what nike tells people to do. just do it. and i did.
i remember i got home around 8:30 that night. i just had a very busy week. and i thought, a PS3 would be something nice to have that weekend. so i rushed to the mall, got there around 9pm. i still have an hour before it closes. i have been canvassing for weeks, so i already know which shop to go to. i went to the shop, asked for the price of the console, additional controller, HDMI cable (i need to have an HDMI cable. what's the point of getting a PS3 if i wont be able to use its HDMI slot and upscaling abilities) and a couple of games. i asked the salesperson to add it all up and i will just go to the nearest ATM to get the money (i try not to carry any money with me when i commute). 20 minutes later, i was paying for the console and the other stuff. holy crap. finally, i have a PS3 (dropped by the nearest ministop first before heading home because i havent eaten my dinner).
i didnt buy it out of impulse (although it appears that way). it was just a question of when. ive been doing my research on which video game console to buy and the PS3 came out on top (and the most expensive). its not simply a video game console like the PS one. its also a Blu-ray player. it also has a large hard disk capacity (320 gig) where i can store pics, music and videos. i dont intend to use it to play music or view pictures. but what really convinced me to buy a PS3 (aside from the video games of course) is that it can play .avi and .mp4 video format. when i learned that i can play and store my downloaded videos in it, i knew its going to be worth my money. i can play games and watch shows i like (and if i eventually decide i want to play non-sedentary video games like the games available on Wii, i can buy its Playstation equivalent, the Playstation Move). the only thing i hate is its internet browser. it sucks. it would have been perfect if its browser was as good as the ones in ordinary computers.
now i can strike the PS3 off my list of tech stuff to buy this year. time to save up for the next gadget. the thanksgiving dinner was...financially draining. if not for that dinner i could have bought myself a really nice digicam and a kindle. but the latter can wait. actually, its not even that necessary. i dont even have to buy it this year.
and now, i have my own PS3. one my major purchases since i became a laywer (the first one was a lenovo laptop which was not for me). im old but not too old for video games. you cant be too old for video games. well, in a few years, my generation will find out if there's such a thing as being too old for video games. video games have changed ever since the 1970s (when the first generation of video game consoles were born).
anyway, i bought it on a friday night, almost three weeks ago. i came home itching to buy it. i was planning on buying one ever since i passed the bar (as a reward for myself) but i cant decide when. almost everyday i kept telling my siblings im going to buy myself a PS3. i cant just buy it because there are a lot of other important things i should be spending my money on (although i do have enough money to buy one, still, i need to prioritize the necessary expenses). also, i have work so when i do buy one, i must have time to play it so i can test it well. but on that particular friday night, i just cant bear it any longer. i just had to buy it. so i did what nike tells people to do. just do it. and i did.
i remember i got home around 8:30 that night. i just had a very busy week. and i thought, a PS3 would be something nice to have that weekend. so i rushed to the mall, got there around 9pm. i still have an hour before it closes. i have been canvassing for weeks, so i already know which shop to go to. i went to the shop, asked for the price of the console, additional controller, HDMI cable (i need to have an HDMI cable. what's the point of getting a PS3 if i wont be able to use its HDMI slot and upscaling abilities) and a couple of games. i asked the salesperson to add it all up and i will just go to the nearest ATM to get the money (i try not to carry any money with me when i commute). 20 minutes later, i was paying for the console and the other stuff. holy crap. finally, i have a PS3 (dropped by the nearest ministop first before heading home because i havent eaten my dinner).
i didnt buy it out of impulse (although it appears that way). it was just a question of when. ive been doing my research on which video game console to buy and the PS3 came out on top (and the most expensive). its not simply a video game console like the PS one. its also a Blu-ray player. it also has a large hard disk capacity (320 gig) where i can store pics, music and videos. i dont intend to use it to play music or view pictures. but what really convinced me to buy a PS3 (aside from the video games of course) is that it can play .avi and .mp4 video format. when i learned that i can play and store my downloaded videos in it, i knew its going to be worth my money. i can play games and watch shows i like (and if i eventually decide i want to play non-sedentary video games like the games available on Wii, i can buy its Playstation equivalent, the Playstation Move). the only thing i hate is its internet browser. it sucks. it would have been perfect if its browser was as good as the ones in ordinary computers.
now i can strike the PS3 off my list of tech stuff to buy this year. time to save up for the next gadget. the thanksgiving dinner was...financially draining. if not for that dinner i could have bought myself a really nice digicam and a kindle. but the latter can wait. actually, its not even that necessary. i dont even have to buy it this year.
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
its only been a month? felt like half a year
officially a lawyer for one full month. i signed the Roll of Attorneys last April 18 (the bar exam results were released last March 17). the last act before one becomes a full fledged member of the Philippine bar. one year ago, i told a friend that i can only relax the moment i sign the rolls. not until that moment, i wont be satisfied with just passing the bar exams. i mean, anything could happen. i could die in an accident before April 18. in that case, i died as a law graduate and a bar exam passer, not a lawyer. and now, a month has passed since i signed the rolls. i still cant fully relax.
being a new lawyer is really tiring. i dont think its just the work that drains me. im still in an adjustment stage. there's a lot of things i dont know. the stuff they teach in law school are just the simple things. the bar exams only ask basic questions. actual law practice is intellectually challenging. i like it of course but there's really no time to immerse in it. there are deadlines to meet, clients to talk to and other stuff to be done. its like learning with a time limit. i cant take my time in thinking and formulating strategies. there are a handful of cases that need attention in a given week. multitasking is not necessarily a must but it would be really, really useful. i know that this is how things are supposed to be since im just starting. over time, things will become routinary. with every case, with every experience i gain, eventually i can handle a number of cases with ease and finish it without much thought.
one problem i have with lawyering is how i can make it "my way". its a bit shallow but its unavoidable too. im not a flashy dresser. im not a smooth talker. i hate talking. well, i prefer not to talk most of the time. but i have to at least be "lawyerly" or conduct myself like one. a few weeks ago, i wanted to buy a leather bag but im backpack type of guy. i go to court wearing a dark barong with a backpack. thats how i do it. but the leather bag really looks nice. and it obviously goes well with court attire. but thats just not me. ever since i was in grade II, i always used a backpack. the only time i dont use a backpack is when i use my laptop bags. so i thought, im going to buy a leather laptop bag. if there's such a thing. stuff like this clutter my brain. its nonsense but the character i play has always been something i really take care of. and i digressed.
i was asked if lawyering is awesome. it is. but right now, i cant enjoy it. time isnt on my side. not yet. im still adjusting how i can keep up with the pace.
being a new lawyer is really tiring. i dont think its just the work that drains me. im still in an adjustment stage. there's a lot of things i dont know. the stuff they teach in law school are just the simple things. the bar exams only ask basic questions. actual law practice is intellectually challenging. i like it of course but there's really no time to immerse in it. there are deadlines to meet, clients to talk to and other stuff to be done. its like learning with a time limit. i cant take my time in thinking and formulating strategies. there are a handful of cases that need attention in a given week. multitasking is not necessarily a must but it would be really, really useful. i know that this is how things are supposed to be since im just starting. over time, things will become routinary. with every case, with every experience i gain, eventually i can handle a number of cases with ease and finish it without much thought.
one problem i have with lawyering is how i can make it "my way". its a bit shallow but its unavoidable too. im not a flashy dresser. im not a smooth talker. i hate talking. well, i prefer not to talk most of the time. but i have to at least be "lawyerly" or conduct myself like one. a few weeks ago, i wanted to buy a leather bag but im backpack type of guy. i go to court wearing a dark barong with a backpack. thats how i do it. but the leather bag really looks nice. and it obviously goes well with court attire. but thats just not me. ever since i was in grade II, i always used a backpack. the only time i dont use a backpack is when i use my laptop bags. so i thought, im going to buy a leather laptop bag. if there's such a thing. stuff like this clutter my brain. its nonsense but the character i play has always been something i really take care of. and i digressed.
i was asked if lawyering is awesome. it is. but right now, i cant enjoy it. time isnt on my side. not yet. im still adjusting how i can keep up with the pace.
Monday, May 16, 2011
i hate wake up calls
i made my first embarrassing court appearance earlier today. the judge really made me look i didnt know what i was doing. i looked so bad that i was honestly waiting for the judge to say to my client to replace me with a more competent counsel. it was a big miscommunication with my client and im to blame. i should have been more cautious. i relied too quickly on what was given to me and acted on it without giving it some more thought.
well, i am a new lawyer (im just two days away from being officially a lawyer for one full month). but thats not really an excuse when i already had a limited law practice for one year and a half. ive attended court hearings before and everything went fine in most, if not all, of my previous court appearances. i even won a case already. sort of. im the one that conducted the direct examination for a particular case, with not much opposition. the only way the court will not rule in my favor is if the judge was heartless. so there's still a slight chance of losing. anyway, this is the first time ive handled a case under a specific and special field of law practice. so, in effect, its my first time. but still, i cant let myself have that excuse.
people would say im being hard on myself. right after the embarrassing moment, my client was in effect consoling me, telling me its all right. thats how bad i took it. i guess my state was like a straight A student who received his first D. im no straight A student, and ive done a lot of disappointing things but i was really shocked with what transpired during today's hearing. i admit i was not really prepared but again, its no excuse. i know i could have done more. i could have served my client better. i know im better than what i showed earlier. i guess its a wake up call for me to take this lawyering seriously. most people think im the serious type but thats really just form. inside, i take most things lightly. its really burdensome to take things seriously.
Sunday, May 15, 2011
Monday, April 18, 2011
Tuesday, April 05, 2011
I know the How and I know the Why
slow day at work today so i looked for some books online and decided to read Orwell's 1984. cant believe i havent read this. its nice i can now read non-law books. i even reserved a box set of Larsson's Millenium Series last Sunday (i just want the paperback version and not the expensive hardbound box set). when i saw on TV that the Swedish version of The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo was released last March 30 on select local theaters, i immediately went to the bookstore to get myself a copy of the trilogy because i dont want to watch it until ive read the book.
Some excerpts from 1984 on power, truth and reality:
There was truth and there was untruth, and if you clung to the truth even against the whole world, you were not mad.
Power is in tearing human minds to pieces and putting them together again in new shapes of your own choosing - O'Brien
"...if you want to keep a secret you must also hide it from yourself. You must know all the while that it is there, but until it is needed you must never let it emerge into your consciousness in any shape that could be given a name."
Power is in tearing human minds to pieces and putting them together again in new shapes of your own choosing - O'Brien
"...if you want to keep a secret you must also hide it from yourself. You must know all the while that it is there, but until it is needed you must never let it emerge into your consciousness in any shape that could be given a name."
Doublethink:
The power of holding two contradictory beliefs in one's mind simultaneously, and accepting both of them....To tell deliberate lies while genuinely believing in them, to forget any fact that has become inconvenient, and then, when it becomes necessary again, to draw it back from oblivion for just so long as it is needed, to deny the existence of objective reality and all the while to take account of the reality which one denies — all this is indispensably necessary. Even in using the word doublethink it is necessary to exercise doublethink. For by using the word one admits that one is tampering with reality; by a fresh act of doublethink one erases this knowledge; and so on indefinitely, with the lie always one leap ahead of the truth
We control matter because we control the mind. Reality is inside the skull. - O'Brien
Monday, April 04, 2011
tech stuff
my cousin just bought a kindle from someone who posted an ad in some online auction and shopping website. the price is really good and i really would like to buy one too so my cousin gave me the person's username and i found out she's also selling beats by Dr. Dre. damn it! i already have a list of gadgets im going to buy this year and even if i really want to, i cant let that list grow much longer (for this year at least). so i will have to end that list with beats and kindle. so self-control, you have an additional work to do.
now that i can spend a little more compared to before, i really need to control my spending. last weekend, i just went shopping for "court clothing" (my feet still hurts because of all the walking and looking for stores that has my size. i didnt know shopping can be torture. the shopping im familiar with is shopping for gadgets and buying groceries. i dont recall my feet hurting for days after shopping for tech stuff and groceries). about 2 weeks earlier, i just bought my sister a laptop. i promised i was going to replace it ever since i took her laptop a few years ago and made it my own. so her Lenovo G4000 is now officially mine and i replaced it with a Lenovo Ideapad Z460 (i have brand loyalty). i was planning to get her a Lenovo G460 but when i went to the Lenovo store at SM North, they said they currently didnt have any stock and a new batch will arrive the day after (and i just asked them 3 days earlier whether they still have enough units available). since i really need the new laptop that day (because my brother needs to finish a school project and our desktop computer cant handle the software requirements. im overprotective of my laptop and i wont install any new software which im not familiar with or unsure of its compatibility with my laptop's OS. its OS is Windows Vista so i really dont feel secure. also, it was only a few days before mercury retrograde so i really had to buy it already. last time i bought a gadget during the retrograde, i had to return the item to be replaced and it took months before i got it back), i went to other computer shops to check their prices. a few shops later, i came across a shop that has a good offer for their Lenovo Ideapad Z460. thats how i ended up buying it instead of going for what i initially planned to buy.
so in less than a month, ive spent more than what i spent for the latter half of 2010. i really need to control my goddamn spending or im going to go bankrupt. at this age, i should be saving some money to buy my own house (actually, when i was 14, i thought i would have my own house by now! and a car! well, at least my 14 year old self was right that i would have my current mindset. i am the person i thought i would be at this age). so after the PS3, PSP and other gadgets, im going to save up to get me self a home sweet home.
now that i can spend a little more compared to before, i really need to control my spending. last weekend, i just went shopping for "court clothing" (my feet still hurts because of all the walking and looking for stores that has my size. i didnt know shopping can be torture. the shopping im familiar with is shopping for gadgets and buying groceries. i dont recall my feet hurting for days after shopping for tech stuff and groceries). about 2 weeks earlier, i just bought my sister a laptop. i promised i was going to replace it ever since i took her laptop a few years ago and made it my own. so her Lenovo G4000 is now officially mine and i replaced it with a Lenovo Ideapad Z460 (i have brand loyalty). i was planning to get her a Lenovo G460 but when i went to the Lenovo store at SM North, they said they currently didnt have any stock and a new batch will arrive the day after (and i just asked them 3 days earlier whether they still have enough units available). since i really need the new laptop that day (because my brother needs to finish a school project and our desktop computer cant handle the software requirements. im overprotective of my laptop and i wont install any new software which im not familiar with or unsure of its compatibility with my laptop's OS. its OS is Windows Vista so i really dont feel secure. also, it was only a few days before mercury retrograde so i really had to buy it already. last time i bought a gadget during the retrograde, i had to return the item to be replaced and it took months before i got it back), i went to other computer shops to check their prices. a few shops later, i came across a shop that has a good offer for their Lenovo Ideapad Z460. thats how i ended up buying it instead of going for what i initially planned to buy.
so in less than a month, ive spent more than what i spent for the latter half of 2010. i really need to control my goddamn spending or im going to go bankrupt. at this age, i should be saving some money to buy my own house (actually, when i was 14, i thought i would have my own house by now! and a car! well, at least my 14 year old self was right that i would have my current mindset. i am the person i thought i would be at this age). so after the PS3, PSP and other gadgets, im going to save up to get me self a home sweet home.
Oh, and one more thing.
"You can deny angels exist. Convince ourselves they can't be real. But they show up anyway, at strange places and at strange times. They can speak through any character we can imagine. They'll shout through demons if they have to. Daring us, challenging us to fight."- Sweet Pea
Just saw Sucker Punch last sunday. its not officially in my movie list for this year (i just mentioned it as a movie i might watch because of Jamie Chung). funny thing is, i think its the first movie ive seen this year (my memory is very selective lately). well, first one ive watched in a movie theater. first one and its not even in my list. its not bad. i would say its a bit good because i see it as something worth watching on a big screen. not necessarily a movie theater. something to watch on a big screen for free like a home theater system. the movie takes you on a enjoyable enough ride. the soundtrack's good too. or maybe the reason i found it enjoyable is because of the female cast. in any case, its definitely not bad for me (my siblings didnt like it. they said it lacks depth. well, maybe. i mean, i dont see what's wrong with Rebecca Black's Friday).
i really should have a print out of my movie list. i already missed the Green Hornet and the Rite. and a couple of movies in my list are currently showing in theaters. i really need to take this movie list seriously now that it seems the movie rental business seems to be on the decline. Video City Matalino permanently closed last month. i think the same thing happened to Video City SM North. where the hell will i rent DVDs now?
Just saw Sucker Punch last sunday. its not officially in my movie list for this year (i just mentioned it as a movie i might watch because of Jamie Chung). funny thing is, i think its the first movie ive seen this year (my memory is very selective lately). well, first one ive watched in a movie theater. first one and its not even in my list. its not bad. i would say its a bit good because i see it as something worth watching on a big screen. not necessarily a movie theater. something to watch on a big screen for free like a home theater system. the movie takes you on a enjoyable enough ride. the soundtrack's good too. or maybe the reason i found it enjoyable is because of the female cast. in any case, its definitely not bad for me (my siblings didnt like it. they said it lacks depth. well, maybe. i mean, i dont see what's wrong with Rebecca Black's Friday).
i really should have a print out of my movie list. i already missed the Green Hornet and the Rite. and a couple of movies in my list are currently showing in theaters. i really need to take this movie list seriously now that it seems the movie rental business seems to be on the decline. Video City Matalino permanently closed last month. i think the same thing happened to Video City SM North. where the hell will i rent DVDs now?
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